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Ash watched him. Wearing his own clothes for the first time. Baggy jeans, T-shirt, a hoodie. They looked too big for him. Nix had lost weight then. Nix stood still outside, blinking, looking about. Ash gave him that moment, gave him space, remembering what it had felt like for him the first time stepping out. Fucking amazing and terrifying all at once.
Ash stood up, held out the spare helmet he’d brought for Nix.
Nix had spotted him.
But he didn’t move.
Nix was standing still. Frozen to the spot. Fuck. Ash smiled, trying to show Nix it was all okay. Nix blinked, but did not move from his spot, a yard or so from the prison gates.
Ash stepped forward, slowly, calmly. “Hey, Nixy-boy.”
“It just you?” Nix’s response came back. Harsh and short.
Not what Ash was expecting or hoping to hear. Ash looked closely. Nix had shadows under his eyes. He hadn’t slept well then. He looked at Ash with a kind of horrified dread. A hunted, haunted, hopeless stare.
“Yeah, it’s just me,” Ash ground back. “What’s up? What’s wrong Nix?”
“It’s… no one else is here?” Nix almost stuttered.
Ash looked about the parking lot, nonplussed. Was Nix seeing things? Had he become delusional in prison or something? “No, no one else is here. Colt and the boys were up for coming but I said you would prefer just me…” Ash trailed off.
Nix didn’t meet Ash’s eyes. He’d glimpsed up and then his gaze had immediately darted down again. Away from him.
Ash frowned. “Were you expecting anyone else? Had you planned on meeting anyone else, Nix?”
Nix shook his head once, and then started walking forward, slowly. Like a man on his way to the execution block.
“Fuck Nix, did you fuck someone else during your stay? ‘Cause I said if you needed to, you could-”
“Shut the hell up!” Nix rounded on him suddenly, looming in his face, anger pinching Nix’s normally beautiful face.
“Whoa.” Ash raised a palm and took a step back. “Okay, big boy, it’s alright-”
“It’s not fucking alright, Ash,” Nix’s voice broke when he tried to say Ash’s name.
Something was clearly up. But Ash was beginning to lose his patience.
“Look, get on the bike or piss off,” Ash said, holding out the helmet again to Nix.
Nix’s eyes landed on the shiny Triumph bike, parked in the middle of the parking lot. Ash watched as Nix’s gaze lingered. Spirit flickered in his blue-amber eyes. A bit of the Nix Ash had known and loved.
“Yeah, it’ll do you good, being on the back of a bike again, Nix. Fuck, I hadn’t realized how much I missed it. But when I got out, Colt had my bike in the van, they wheeled it out, and as soon as I felt it vibrating under me… phew…” Ash chatted away, trying to break through Nix’s barrier of stone that he’d put up. And Ash thought he’d chipped a hole through. Or the bike had at least.
But then, bam.
No. Nix’s eyes dulled again. “I’ve got to ride with you?”
Ash flexed his jaw, getting annoyed now. “Yeah.”
“I’m no one’s backpack,” Nix spat, snatching the helmet from Ash and striding toward the bike.
Ash stared as Nix headed toward his bike. Was Nix actually genuinely thinking of getting on Ash’s bike and riding off without him? The fucker. Ash gripped the keys in his pocket.
“You absolute… you can’t seriously be even considering-”
“Don’t test me Ash, because I’m not in the fucking mood-”
Ash stomped forward, looking down at the ground, his sunny dreams of welcoming Nix to the MC in tatters at his feet. Something was up for sure, but if Nix wasn’t going to let Ash in, then there wasn’t anything Ash could do about it. Ash let anger and betrayal work its wicked way into his flesh.
