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Not yet.
I tilt my head to look at him from a new angle. “Why did you bring me here, Misha?”
He cracks his knuckles frustratedly. “As you can probably tell, I’m not good at talking about how I feel. Or admitting when I’m wrong. I figured maybe this gesture would say all the things that I can’t bring myself to.”
“Like?”
His silver eyes meet mine. “Like that I was wrong, Paige. I thought that a loveless marriage would spare us both heartache. But in the end, it’s been the cause of it.”
I’m barely breathing. “What are you trying to say, Misha?”
He edges forward and takes my hand. He holds it in both of his, running a finger up and down my palm. I get chills from head to toe. “I didn’t think things would get this complicated.”
“You didn’t think you’d develop feelings for me, you mean?”
He smiles. “See? That’s what attracted me to you in the first place. You call it like you see it. You’re not trying to be anything you’re not.”
“That’s not entirely true. I want to be the kind of wife you need me to be, Misha,” I whisper. “And I try at that every day.”
“You don’t have to try. You deserve so much better than you’ve gotten out of the world. You deserve better than Anthony. And you deserve better than me.”
My eyes go wide as he tightens his grip on my hand and pulls me flush against his body. “Misha, what are you saying?”
“I’m sorry I made you feel like you were not worthy of me,kiska. I’m sorry I forced you into a loveless marriage. But I’m most sorry for making you think that I didn’t care. Because the truth is, I love you, Paige Orlov.” He brings my hands to his lips, pressing a kiss to my knuckle. “I’m sorry I took so long to say it.”
28
MISHA
There’s no going back now.
Paige stares up at me, caught between disbelief and hope. “Misha…”
“I know I’ve said a lot of stupid shit in the last few weeks,” I say. “But starting now, I’m going to be honest.”
“I’m not sure what’s happening right now. If you’re messing with me, it’s cruel.”
“I’m not messing with you, Paige.”
She shakes her head. “But what’s changed? You’ve been pushing me away since the explosion. So why this? Why now?What changed?”
“Everything and nothing,” I explain. “I just realized that fighting my feelings for you would be infinitely harder than getting over my fear of losing you.”
“And that’s why you were keeping me at arm’s length all this time? You were afraid to lose me?”
I nod. “It wasn’t because I didn’t want you, Paige. I’ve always wanted you.”
“Even though we don’t make any sense?”
I raise my eyebrows. “You don’t think we make sense?”
“Come on, Misha. Look at the other women in your life. They’re all educated and cultured and glamorous. I’m the ugly duckling in a pond full of swans.”
“You are not ugly,” I growl.
“You know what I mean.”
“Actually, I don’t. I don’t know where you get the impression that you’re inferior. It’s easy to be cultured and glamorous when you have a headstart in life. What’s more impressive is to achieve those things when you have to work at it all by yourself.”
