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My bloody tears drip to the floor as my back bows in pain. All I know for a while is agony until finally it submits to a constant, bone-deep ache, making my fangs clench. It’s only then I realise someone is stroking my hair and humming a familiar tune.
“Simon?” I whisper without opening my eyes.
“It’s me,” he murmurs. “Oh Thea, I’m so sorry. I’m so very sorry. I’d kill him for you if I could.”
“What will I do?” I whimper, turning into him to bury my face in his warmth and familiarity, grounding myself in it.
“You will survive this, just like you have survived everything else. You’ll go out there and show your face proudly,” he snaps.
“How can I?” I cry, gripping him tighter. “They all know I am dishonoured, rejected, and unwanted. I will be shunned. The court might even kick me out.”
“Then fuck them. We’ll go to a different one,” he yells, and when I lift my head, I see matching tears tracking down his face. “Thea,” he croaks.
Every vampyr knows the agony that comes with a rejected mate, or at least the tales of it.
Though it’s not often.
“I’m all alone.”
“Never, you have me,” he protests, but it doesn’t fill the coldness inside me nor keep the pain at bay or fix the thirst as much as both of us wish it did.
He’s wrong. He’ll leave too. He’ll have to because to be associated with me would ruin his chances.
His life.
I know he’ll stay, even if it does just that, and as he sings to me, holding me tightly, I make a split-second decision.
I cannot save me or my future, maybe I never could, but I can save him from suffering this fate with me, even if it’s the last thing I do.
* * *
Sliding from the bed, I slowly lower his arm to the pillow. I was once so excited over my black bedding, but now it fills me with nothing but anger because I’ll never share it with another.
My mother’s apartments, which are adjoined to mine, still stand empty in the top of the mansion I know I won’t be able to keep now. I don’t think I could stand watching them rip that last part of her from me.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, I glance over my shoulder at the only family I have left.
Moonlight streams through the huge windows covering the entire right side between the decorative stone walls. Simon is lying on his side with his head turned towards me, his fangs bared as he snores.
Reaching down, I sweep the hair from his forehead. We’ve shared beds like this since we were kids. Every time one of us was sick, hurt, or upset, we were always there for one another.
The idea of losing him . . .
I gasp in pain, clutching my chest and my broken heart.
The bond rips into me, but over that is the agony of losing the only family I have left and seeing that love turn to hatred. I couldn’t bear it.
No, he’s better off without me.
Maybe it’s cowardly to do this and I should face my court, but I’ve seen this far too often—not a rejected mate, which I saw only once as a child. He was our leader, our king of the court, and when his mate rejected him, he lost everything. Nobody believed in him anymore, and his power, his standing, his home, and his future were all gone in an instant, ripped away as he was tossed onto the streets like a pauper. But to be stripped? I see that every night for those who are being punished or who have broken social standing. It’s common; our laws are absolute.
They will do that to me. I know it’s inevitable. I will be forced to watch as I am snubbed and rejected once more, so I’ll leave and reject them before they have the chance to do so to me.
I’ll save Simon the only way I can. I’ll give him, my brother, my best friend, my only family, a chance at a better life because if I stay, he’ll stay right by my side with me, like he has since we were kids.
Tiptoeing around the room, I grab bits and bobs, knowing he won’t wake up. He’s always been a deep sleeper. Stepping to the walk-in wardrobe, I collect as much as I can without overpacking.
I know I’ll never be back, but I have no idea where I am going, so there is no point in taking too much. I do take the photographs of Simon and me and my mother and me when I was born from my vanity, knowing I’ll need them when I’m alone and scared. I leave the fancy dresses and masks, since I won’t need them for court anymore.
