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“Goddamn you, Grey,” she says, and I shake my head, cutting off whatever remark she was going to make. She’s said her piece. Now we can move on.
“Can you come over and yell at me another time?” I ask, and she shakes her head as I move toward the door. “I just want to be alone.”
“We aren’t done talking.”
“We are, for now. But you’re right. We have things to discuss…like Joshua’s college and the money you’re going to put into it. It needs to be equal from now on, Karen. I’m tired of always shouldering the burden.”
She huffs in frustration and disbelief. “I raised him. Without you. How’s that for equal?”
“I would have too...if you had let me. I wanted my son in my life more than you’ll ever know, and you kept him from me. You did it on purpose to be spiteful. And I always paid more than I had to because I felt guilty, but I want Joshua’s college to be split between us. It’s only fair.”
“I can’t afford it.”
“You can, Karen. I know you can. You just want to punish me some more. And I’m done.”
She scoffs, and I push the front door open to my house and step inside. Winter gets up, trotting after me like the loyal dog he is.
“We can discuss it more, but I’d appreciate it if you didn’t spin this to Josh like I’m not going to pay for his college. I am, I just want you to help.”
She rolls her eyes, and I shut the door in her face, leaning up against the wooden frame and breathing deeply.
I hadn’t planned to say all that, but it felt damn good.
But now, I’m starting to shake, my entire body trembling with adrenaline and misery. I slide to the floor and press my face to my knees. Winter pushes his cold nose to my cheek and it jolts me out of my panic.
I can’t believe I just did that. I can’t believe I told her off.
Oh fuck, what have I done?
ChapterTwenty
Grey
Ihalf-expect to receive texts from Joshua about my conversation with his mother, but I don’t. It’s oddly silent. I’m not sure if that’s because she didn’t call him the moment she left or she did and he’s just thrown me away with the garbage.
God, I hope it’s the former. I don’t want him to have given up on us because of Quinn.
Fuck.
Quinn.
My chest aches and I rub at it. Maybe I’m having a heart attack. Maybe the end is nigh.
I wouldn’t put it past the Grim Reaper. Even he is probably mad at me, watching me all these years, shaking his head at all my bad decisions. Maybe it’s time.
Blowing out a breath, I glance down at my phone, the unanswered text to Quinn staring up at me.
Me:
I’m home. Can we talk?
I haven’t heard a thing from him. It’s radio silence on his end too. I’d expectedsomething. Anything. But perhaps now that he’s had some time away from me, he’s realized that I’m not worth it after all.
The thought drives me into a downward spiral, and I end up on my couch, watching wildlife documentaries. Nothing like watching live animals get eaten to really put things into perspective. It could be worse. I could be that water buffalo getting chomped on by a crocodile.
Though it does feel like my heart is getting chomped on as we speak. Masticated and death rolled.
Winter looks a little worse for wear too and I know he can sense how upset I’ve been. Maybe he misses Quinn just as much as I do. I should tell him. I am so going to use this as an excuse to get him to talk to me. Because Winter is technicallyourdog. He can ignore me all he wants, but he can’t ignore his fucking dog.
