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I could’ve sworn I heard another gasp/choke sound from one of the twins, followed by a slap on the back, but I kept my eyes on Otto.
“Sounds good, Little Bird. Besides, we already have our thing—stories. I think we could all use a few new ones. What do you think, guys?”
“Yes. Absolutely,” the twins said, and Rueben nodded against my back. My stomach rumbled, and the guys jumped into motion again.
“Let’s eat! I get to be Raven’s seat this time,” Otto proclaimed, lifting me from Rueben. He took in my outfit, licking his lips.
“You’re too cute for words, Cutie-pie,” Porter said, taking my hand and spinning me in front of them.
Otto waited until he was done, taking my other hand to walk to the table where Phoenix unloaded Chinese food containers. Sitting in Otto’s lap, I ate and laughed, knowing I never wanted my life to be separate from them again. It didn’t matter if they only wanted to be my friends, or if we could all be something more like the heat in their gazes suggested, I just knew I’d be here for it all.
13
RUEBEN
We climbedthe rollaway stairs to the jet, my eyes checking every direction someone could possibly attack from. I trusted in Raven’s abilities, but I didn’t know these people, and my past dictated my constant vigilance. I wouldn’t let anyone endanger my family—and that included Raven now.
“Holy cow, babe. This is incredible,” Porter gushed, taking in the leather couches and chairs. “Otto, I’m afraid I can no longer be happy with flying first class. It’s private or nothing for this bum from here on out.”
Raven giggled as Otto rolled his eyes, sitting beside her. I watched my closest friends, enjoying how much they’d softened since she’d entered our lives. We’d needed her more than I realized, having become too jaded and untrusting of others. Though, each of us for good reason.
“Miss Raven, we’ll be taking off in a few minutes. The flight is only a few hours, and we should land around 3 am. There are some light refreshments and snacks in the galley. Otherwise, let me know if you need something, and I’ll see you when we land,” the pilot said. He was an older man with white hair, a tall frame, and a kind smile for Raven. His eyes had taken us in with a calculating gleam as he observed us. His protectiveness settled my nerves, and I had a feeling there was more than met the eye with him. He gave off a retired Air Force vibe.
“Thank you, Phillip. These are my friends,” Raven said, motioning toward all of us, her smile so sweet, it was a wonder there weren’t people dropping at her feet just to see it.
He nodded his head, smiling. “Welcome. I’m glad Ms. Raven has made some friends. She’s a special one. We’ll be on our way momentarily.”
“That she is,” Otto said, wrapping his arm around Raven. She snuggled into him, her cheeks reddening at his praise.
I took my seat after ensuring everyone was buckled, my eyes roaming over the airstrip. It was hard to turn off my protector mode, wanting to stop anything from harming my family. I hadn’t always been this way—a partial mute with possessive tendencies. But that was the thing about trauma; it had a way of making you into something you’d never intended to be.
The plane’s lights dimmed a moment before it moved, taxiing down the airstrip. With the time of night and private field, we were taking off in a matter of seconds, with no other planes to worry about.
Raven’s fingers entwined with mine, pulling my attention away from the window. She smiled at me when my eyes landed on her, my heart galloping at the sight. As cliche as it sounded, everything was different with her.
Most women didn’t look twice at me once they realized I wouldn’t talk to them. And the ones that did weren’t anyone I’d want to spend time with. They saw me as a project, someone to fix.
My voice wasn’t the problem—words were. There weren’t ones in the English language that could convey the damage I felt inside, the pain I’d experienced. After screaming for hours and months on end, I finally realized it didn’t matter what I said or how loud I cried.
No one was coming for me.
No one was stopping her.
No one was listening.
At some point, when your words no longer mattered, you quit trying to use them; the rejection stinging a little less each time when no one cared. If you said nothing, there was nothing to hope for, no savior coming to rescue you. My words had become the only control I had, holding all my broken edges together. The abuse hurt a little less if you refused to give it a voice.
Now, I only used my voice in the rare moments I wanted to be heard. It was funny how by not speaking, it made people listen more.
Raven didn’t look at me as someone to fix or pity. She found a way to speak to my soul, communicating with me beyond words. She softened the edges, the sharp blades of my past not piercing my skin quite as deeply. I could breathe around her, just like I could the guys.
Maybe it was because we’d known about her for years; her stories had become a part of our hearts, pulling our damaged pieces together. But I didn’t believe that was all of it. I’d felt the connection before I even knew who she was. Fate had brought us together, our connection beyond comprehension.
“Did you find a rental to stay in?” Raven asked, turning her head slightly to look at the others.
“Yeah. Thankfully, this town had a little more to offer, being on the coast and more of a tourist destination,” Phoenix supplied, pulling out his phone. He turned it, showing her the pictures.
“Ooh! It has a jacuzzi tub!” she cheered, making our next spot on the heist/assassin tour sound like a vacation. I didn’t understand how she could exude such light and optimism, finding joy in the small things with her job. But maybe that was it. She saw the darker parts of life and could tiptoe in them when she needed, but she didn’t linger or let them stick to her.
