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I wondered these things, filled with his cock and his cum, knowing with the very marrow of my bones that Ididindeed belong to him.
But I didn't tell him I loved him.
CHAPTER 31
LINCOLN
“Imiss the old days, when lots of hot sex made you happy,” Ari complained as I threw a puck at him and smirked.
I didn’t miss the old days.
I could barely remember them, actually. I was so lost in this haze of…bedazzlement, it was hard to think of before.
Sometimes I did miss the days when I was capable of rationality…but my sanity was a sacrifice that had to be made.
Monroe’s altar was the only thing I wanted to worship.
Fuck everything else.
“So, it’s good then?” Ari pressed, his smile fading as he stared at me pensively.
I tried to think of how to describe it to my best friend. To make him understand how, in a moment, my whole axis had shifted. How I’d been completely reborn.
“She’s everything,” I finally said simply.
And he nodded. Almost like he got it.
“You guys looked like you were in your own little world last night. It was fucking weird.”
I chuckled, shaking my head as he winked and started wrapping tape around his hockey stick.
My smile faded as I thought for the thousandth time of those three little words she was refusing to say.
I couldn’t stop thinking about it.
It tore at my skin, burrowing under the surface, like a sliver I couldn’t get out.
I understood she was scared. I was too.
Falling in love with her had been the scariest thing I’d ever done. Knowing that someone existed on the earth that you would do anything for…die for…cut yourself open and bleed out for…it was a heavy, life-altering feeling.
But I’d jumped over the edge with her. Fallen hard in a way I could never come back from.
I loved her. I loved her so much it hurt. Like she’d torn out a piece of my heart and put it in her chest instead, and now I was dependent on her even to breathe.
She’d wanted to keep us a fucking secret?
That had been one of the craziest things I’d ever heard in my life. Women hadalwayswanted me, even as a young kid. They’d follow me around the playground in droves, begging me to be their boyfriend—whatever that meant in first grade.
As I got older, it only grew worse.
I was the perfect gold star alpha hero that women all over the world thirsted for…would do anything for. Any girl I’d slept with or gone to an event with went absolutely nuts on social media, wanting to tell every person alive they’d managed to bag me for one night.
And the girl who had finally captured me, fucking body and soul…wanted to hide us?
Fuck that.
The door to the locker room swung open and in walked Coach. "Alright, boys," he barked. "It's time to go out there and kick some ass. Don’t do stupid shit, remember how to fucking pass, and let's bring home a win."
