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When I glance back and catch Lev’s stare—his hands are fisted at his sides and a sinister smile’s on his face—I’m certain he knew exactly what he was doing just now.
CHAPTER4
MADDOX
Love is a finicky thing.Makes you do crazy shit. Oftentimes, I sit back and watch Ridge as he carries out a plot of destruction. Be it a midnight visit to his angel, a senseless fight with a stranger who peggedhis girlwith the wrong look, or even something as miniscule as sharing the air she breathes. Today it was choking our best friend with an audience. He didn’t give a damn who saw. He came to her defense while I stood idly by, never once stepping in because I didn’t know whose side to choose.
I’ve always wondered what goes through Ridge’s mind in these moments. Does he feel an ounce of remorse for the things he does? Is there any weight of regret hanging heavy on his mind?
More often than not, the answer is no. Why? Because he does it all for her.
How will I ever outshine him in Riley’s eyes when he’s willing to go to the depths of the earth for her?
With Ridge, it’s not his victims who feel the wrath of his disgruntled behavior, it’s himself. Now here I am—mimicking the same behavior. I’m doing this for Riley, but it will be the one bad deed I’ve done that she’ll never know about. Therefore, Ridge is still her hero.
It’s true that I always try to do the right thing. I believe karma gives sinners what they deserve. But lately,I find myself questioning what the right thing is. My entire life I’ve hung on to my dad's every word, assuming he’s always right. He knows everything. In my eyes, he can do no wrong. Now, I’m starting to realize what he thinks is right for him, might not be the same thing as what’s right for me.
I'm sitting across from Cade, on babysitting duty until Ridge gets here. He drugged our girl before he committed heinous acts to her body. So, naturally, we kidnapped him.
All in the name of love.
Maybe I’m crazy for thinking this thing with me and Riley could ever work. Even if I do love her, Ridge’s morbid love for her will always exist, and I don’t have the guts to go to the extremes he does. So does that make me unworthy of her?
“Do you believe in love at first sight?” I ask Cade, who’s bound and gagged in the chair in front of me. He can’t answer, but his eyes are telling—wide and alert, the epitome of horror-struck. “I don’t either.” I stand up to pace in front of him, tapping my chin as I bide time until Ridge gets here so he can interrogate him again. “In fact, I’m a believer that the whole love at first sight thing came from fairy tales, and well, we all know fairy tales aren’t real. You have to know the person to fall in love with them, right?”
Cade drops his chin to his chest, beaten and defeated. He doesn’t give a damn what I have to say, and I really don’t care if he listens or not. It’s just nice to think out loud sometimes, and he happens to be in my vicinity. Even if he doesn’t have a choice.
This place is depressing as fuck. There’s colorful graffiti covering the cement block walls from trespassers that entered before Lev acquired the building. Every wall is embellished with an array of artistic designs and scribbled curse words. The concrete floor and lack of insulation make it colder than the Arctic. Fortunately there’s a small space heater, but it only helps if you’re standing directly in front of it.
The warehouse, that’s been abandoned for years, is set in the middle of a field not far from campus. The only comfort in this building is the room Lev had remodeled for his appointments with his therapist. The fucker bought the entire building, just so he could use that one room and have the privacy he desperately needs during his sessions. I don’t fault him for it. Hell, I’d do the same thing if I had the emotional incapacity that Lev does. I’ve never witnessed one of his sessions, but from what I gather, there is a lot of screaming on his part, and oftentimes, he breaks shit as well.
Ridge had the grand idea of utilizing the extra space in the warehouse for a fight club, which I think is a fantastic idea. I’m sure there are a lot of students on campus who would love to have a place to go to let out some of the aggression we’re forced to hold in, due to being in The Society. We’re not like normal people. In fact, we’re the complete opposite of normal, and fuck if it isn’t enough to make someone crazy. It’s been almost five years since I stepped into my role as a Blue Blood—the start of junior year at The Academy. Now being a junior at BCU, I’ve seen enough to know that we’re all going to be in dire need of therapy for years to come.
A triple knock at the door—our code for entry—has me snapping out of my thoughts, and Cade lifting his head. “Sounds like your dinner is here.” I approach the door and click the deadbolt. “Better hope Ridge is in a pleasant mood today.”
Before I have a chance to turn the knob, it comes flying open, causing me to jump back.
My eyes slide over to Cade’s cautious ones as Ridge enters, the large space suddenly feeling small in his presence.
As soon as the door closes, Ridge clicks the lock, and the tension thickens. We haven’t talked much lately. It’s been two weeks since Riley and I started hanging out more. I wouldn’t say we’re ‘dating,’ but we’re getting there. It’s also been two weeks since we brought Cade down here. In that same amount of time, all conversations between Ridge and me have been focused on Cade and our plans for him. For a while, I was concerned Ridge might kill him. Ridge is unpredictable in that way. Not to mention, Cade hurt Riley, and that’s a death sentence in Ridge’s eyes. And maybe even mine too.
But something is stopping him, and I’m not sure what it is. Either way, I’m grateful because I’d rather not be an accomplice to murder.
Ridge chucks a paper lunch bag that's rolled up at Cade. It hits his chest, then rolls into his lap, almost falling to the floor. “Eat, fucker.”
“How’s he supposed to do that?” I scoff. “His hands are tied behind his back.”
“He seems like a resourceful kinda guy. He’ll figure it out.”
The bag hits the floor, and my eyes roll as I grab it. Reaching in the bag, I scowl at Ridge, while pulling out a squished sandwich that’s not even in a plastic baggie. I hold it up, displaying the contents, when I realize a bite’s been taken out of it.
Ridge shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly. “Got hungry on the walk over.”
“Dipshit,” I mumble under my breath, but the nudge to my shoulder confirms he heard me loud and clear.
“Why the fuck do you care if this bastard eats? In case you forgot, he took advantage of our girl.”
“Ourgirl?” I laugh. Funny how he says it that way, considering it wasn’t long ago that he scolded me for referencing her the same, when he was certain she was his and his alone. "Not our girl.” I spin around to face him, sandwich in hand. “My girl.”
