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“You did the best you could with what you had, and I’m incredibly proud of who you’ve become.”
The last thing I expected was to be torn apart by those words. There was no holding back the flood gate as tears overwhelmed me. I twisted and sobbed into his shirt while gripping the fabric tight in my fists.
Arven said nothing more. He held me and let me process the emotions I’d kept shoved down so deep that I’d forgotten they could even exist. Alone, I’d had no need for them. The desire to be told that I was doing all right had faded into the background because I needed to survive more than I needed acknowledgement.
Here, alone with Arven in my domain, I could let it all go and fall to pieces because I knew he wouldn’t judge me as I picked them up.
“Bastard,” I muttered into his shirt.
He laughed. “My parents are married, thank you. If you would like to call me something derogatory, trymonsterorbeast. Perhaps evensundererwould be poetic and devastating all at once.”
I shook my head. “You’re none of those things. You’re just a man doing what he has to in order to stave off the wars that others have started.”
“Look at us,” he said. “Two children of war, capable of bringing down our greatest foes while being absolutely incapable of dealing with even the mildest of emotions.”
It was my turn to laugh. I twisted so that I was lying across his lap again. His fingers found my hair. He toyed with the braids and made my scalp tingle with the effort of his small affections. I almost purred at his touch, but that would have been a little too much, even for this vulnerable moment.
“Will it be too much for you to open the crates tonight?” Arven asked.
I wanted to say no, but I knew that if I opened the crates that this overwhelming wave of emotion would drag me down to depths that I was not prepared for tonight. Lips twisted, I decided to put it off, no matter how badly I wanted to open them.
Upon hearing my response, Arven lifted me from the floor. He turned and carried me towards the loft.
“Don’t you dare throw me over your shoulder in order to climb the ladder.” I kicked to roll out of his grasp.
Arven was prepared. He pulled me tight to his chest. I took that as a challenge and went limp. He wasn’t ready to deal with my uneven weight as my muscles unbound themselves. As he readjusted his grip, I flung myself out of his arms.
My feet hit the floor. I tried to leap away, but Arven quickly slung an arm under my waist and caught me by the hips. He yanked me back into his body and started to climb the ladder one-handed while I hung from the other arm.
Wiggling my hips, I got my pelvis above his forearm and tumbled forward out of his hold again. This time, the floor was a little further away, so I used that as an in-between to vanish. Of course, Arven could follow my scent anywhere. I couldn’t go far, but I didn’t want to.
This was fun, in a way. I didn’t have to pretend to be anything other than who I was right now. I didn’t have to play the part of the princess that I used to be. I wasn’t a cold-hearted assassin, either. I was somewhere in the middle, searching for fun and using all the skills I’d learned as an assassin to test the limitations of my new…
I reappeared atop the loft, in the far corner and dropped into a crouch while I listened to Arven sniff the air for my trail. What was he to me? A friend? A crush? My betrothed again?
I didn’t know what we were or what any of this meant. Why should I even consider it now? Was this moment for fun? Why should we put labels on something that still needed defining?
Arven leapt up the ladder and landed in a crouch in the loft. I was in this position because it gave me a movement advantage should I want to run. Arven assumed this position because the ceiling was literally too low for his massive frame. He leaned forward and planted his hands on the floor like a beast.
Our eyes connected across the loft. I couldn’t help the laugh that escaped me. Arven rushed towards me. I dodged and rolled out of the way. I heard the scratch of his feet skidding to a halt as he spun and repositioned himself.
I flipped and landed flat on my back on the mattress. Cocky, I folded my hands behind my head and threw a smug look in his direction as I crossed my ankles in comfort. Arven spared no time pouncing on me.
His groin pinned me to the mattress. He straddled me and braced himself on his thick arms, hands on either side of my head. His hair fell around his face like a dark veil. Under the shadow of it, I saw the red flicker of beastly light in his eyes and couldn’t help but reach up to touch his cheek.
The beastly light didn’t fade, but the corners of his eyes softened, and his lips parted.
When he bucked his hips into mine, a jolt of pleasure rocketed through me. He growled low, and I soaked in the vibrations of the sound. Desire suddenly unfurled and overcame all my senses. I grabbed ahold of his arms and dug my nails into his firm muscles.
Arven bowed his head and snarled. When he nuzzled my neck, I raised my chin to give him better access. He inhaled deeply, as if trying to memorize my scent so that he would never lose me again. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and held him tight because a small part of me didn’t want to lose him either.
We’d been alone for so long, each of us flung in opposite directions. Apart, we’d become monsters. That didn’t change while we were together, but it meant that we didn’t have to hide from each other. Here, in the loft of my domain, we could be exactly who we were and neither of us would bat an eye.
“You’re so much more than I expected, and I have become infatuated with everything I see of you,” Arven said into my skin.
I inhaled sharply and arched into him. He pressed kisses along my exposed throat, pausing to gently bite here and there. The sensations rippled through me and awoke a smoldering fire deep within my core. I throbbed with need. Every part of us that touched became a small inferno that I wanted to lose myself in.
Arven thrust into my hips again. His growl became lower, more violent. It didn’t scare me. Instead, I felt my own need echoed in the sound. He wanted me as much as I wanted him right now. There was no mistaking what this was.
