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“Maybe,” I say, tilting my chin up toward him. Raising my lips closer to his. “But you still took the risk to make sure they wouldn’t hurt me.”
“What do you want from me, Fiona? I hate the way Carson looked at you. I hate the way it made me feel. Like I was losing something. Like he might take it from me.”
“Nobody’s taking me from you,” I say, blinking at him. “Is that what you think?”
He shakes his head. “It’s stupid. I’ve just—” He lets out a sharp breath. “I’ve lost before. A long time ago. It—it fucked me up. Made it hard to trust.”
“Do you trust me?” I ask.
“I think so. I know we can do this. We work well together.” His eyes drift again. To my lips. To my chest.
“We do work well together.”
“I can’t handle the thought of wanting you like this but being unable to act on it. Stuck at the same level as those mafia fucking pricks.”
“You don’t have to be stuck,” I whisper. “But you have to stop acting like you’re embarrassed of me. No more asking me to change.”
“I won’t,” he says. I believe him. He still doesn’t move. I’m still staring into his eyes, chin tilted up. Practically begging him to press his lips to mine.
Why won’t he kiss me? Why is he holding back, now of all times? We’re supposed to be faking this the right way—so why not give in?
Whatever we do now, it doesn’t count. None of this is real.
But even fake things can feel good.
God, what am I doing? What am I thinking? If I go further than kissing with Gareth—what will that mean?
It’ll only complicate things.
But I want him. I want him so badly, it’s like a craving I can’t shake.
Every kiss. Every time his hand brushes against my skin. Every time he grips my thigh or grabs my arm.
It makes me want him more.
Now, the way he’s looking at me? It’s like he’s going to break if he can’t taste my lips.
His right hand brushes against my cheek. Knuckles drift down to my chin, down my neck, down to my collarbone. To the tops of my breasts.
“I could claim you,” he whispers. “Leave my mark.” His hand turns, palm flat against my chest. Inches from my bikini. Inches from my tits. His fingers curl, digging into the skin. “Let everyone here know who has you. That way, I won’t be so paranoid. I can still be possessive, but I won’t let it overwhelm me. Knowing you’re mine.”
“Then why don’t you?” I ask.
His eyes meet mine.
And he kisses me.
Chapter22
Fiona
Imelt into his kiss.Finally. His kiss, this kiss, it’s what I’ve been needing since the moment we pulled up to this house.
I’ve been a mess of nerves. I’m so afraid I’m going to say something stupid. Something that’ll ruin the whole game. Something that’ll embarrass him.
So when he told me to get changed, it triggered all that anxiety.
It was like, god, I don’t even have totalkand I’m still somehow a pathetic dork.
