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“The truth is, I don’t know,” Amy admitted. “I mean, he wouldn’t be able to lie to me about his identity, you’re right about that, but there are plenty of other ways he could manipulate me.”
“How?”
“I’m still attracted to him,” Amy said. “And that is definitely going to be a problem.”
“Oh yeah? What does he look like? Is he hot?”
Amy couldn’t help but grin at that. “God, Megan, he’s one of the hottest men I’ve ever met. I can’t stand it. I mean, if I were going to design my perfect man, it would be him.” She thought again of his lean physique, his dark eyes and styled hair that was long enough to get her fingers into, the way his muscles had felt against her body.
“Even though he’s sick?”
“He’s not sick right now,” she said. “I mean, he’s got the disease, but he’s relatively healthy with it. And besides, you know Barks-Howard’s isn’t the kind of thing that makes you lose your looks. It’s only when your immune system fails and you catch some secondary thing that you really start to fall apart.”
“What does he look like?”
Amy thought about it. “Do you remember Jason Harroway?”
“From med school? The pediatrics guy?”
“Yeah, him.”
“I had such a crush on him.”
“We both did,” Amy agreed. “Anyway, Adriano Canali looks like Jason, but better. He’s taller, with more angular features. And there’s something about the way he looks at you, like he’s going to strip you naked just with his eyes…” She shivered, remembering what that had felt like. “He’s really the sexiest man I’ve ever met, Megan. Even if he had never done anything wrong to me at all, I don’t know if I would be able to work with him without wanting more.”
“You’ve never had to work with someone who made you feel that way before?”
“Like who, the doctors here at the hospital? All the men here are at least ten years older than I am.”
Megan giggled. “Is that such a bad thing?”
“Not for you, maybe.” Megan had always had a proclivity for older men, but Amy knew she could never have dated men as old as the ones her friend preferred.
“Anyway,” she said, returning to the point. “The trouble is that Adriano is so attractive, and every time I’m around him, all I’m going to be able to think about is what it’s like to have sex with him. I won’t be able to focus on my work at all.”
“Whatisit like to have sex with him?”
“I mean…” Amy sighed. “It’s amazing, to tell you the truth. I haven’t had such great sex maybe ever. And I’m sure it was only because of the circumstances, because we were strangers who met at a bar, because I was doing something that felt forbidden. Probably if we did it again, it wouldn’t feel that amazing.”
“You should do it again and find out,” Megan suggested.
“What?! That’s a terrible idea.”
“Why? If you can’t stop thinking about being with him, you should just be with him and get it out of your head.”
“Or get it even deeper into my head,” Amy countered. “The first time didn’t exactly get it out of my system, you know. Who’s to say that if I do it again, I won’t just find myself completely hooked?”
“I don’t know, but I think you should do it,” Megan said. “The poor guy just got a terminal diagnosis. He deserves a little fun.”
“I’m not running a charity, Megan.”
“Who said anything about charity? He’s paying by funding your research.”
“Oh my God. I’m definitely not runningthatkind of service.”
Megan laughed. “The look on your face,” she said. “It’s nice to see you thinking about something other than work, I have to say. But no, I really do think you should be doing this, Amy. You’re not going to get another opportunity like this one. I doubt there are a hundred people in all of the United States with Barks-Howard’s, and how many of them do you think have this kind of money to invest? You need to do this, no matter what you think of the guy.”
“I know that’s right,” Amy said. “If nothing else, I owe it to everyone else out there who has this disease. If I can help them, I have to try.”
