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Here I was trying to build something with Declan, when I’d never even had a real relationship. How would I know what was normal and what wasn’t? I’d witnessed plenty of them over the years at the restaurant. Oh, how I envied them. They had all been free to do what they wanted, live the life they wanted, and even date who they chose.
I’d been so afraid of getting close to anyone. Not because they would hurt me, but because I was afraid that one day I’d have to pack up and run again. I didn’t think my heart would handle leaving everything behind again.You don’t just walk away from the bad, but you lose the good too.
A chill ran through me. That same thing could happen with Declan. I couldn’t imagine not having him in my life again. Not after us finally finding each other again after all this time. It would crush me to have to say goodbye a second time.
I closed my eyes and forced such thoughts out of my mind. It wasn’t realistic. Declan would never let me just disappear. Heck, I didn’t even know he was watching when I left Halifax, and look at the extent that he went to in order to find me again.
“You look like you’re in deep thought,” Declan said. “With your expression, I sure hope you’re not planning your list of questions for me.”
Instantly, the heaviness was lifted. “Oh, you should be scared. There is so much I want to know about you.”
He handed me a sandwich and a bottle of water. “Let me start by answering one for you. I’m not a cook. My idea of making us lunch is a sandwich. If I’m going all out, I’ll add some potato chips on the side.”
I took a bite and then laughed. “I don’t think chips would go with peanut butter and jelly.”
“It’s not just any PB&J. I used strawberry jam,” he said, taking a bite of his sandwich.
“Wow. Didn’t realize we were fine dining,” I teased. “Should I have asked what else you packed for food supplies for our trip? Not that I don’t enjoy a good PB&J, but there is nothing wrong with a little variety.”
“I have all the basic necessities. Fruit. Nuts. Soup. Stuff for sandwiches. Oh, I also have plenty of snacks. You might not know this, but here is another fun fact about me. I love to snack. Crackers. Cookies. Chips. Ice cream.”
My eyes widened. “What flavor?”
“Chips?”
“No. Ice cream,” I said. “What flavor did you bring?”
“Oh. I didn’t. I was just saying what I like.”
“That’s not very nice. Has anyone ever told you that you’re a tease?” I joked. “Because I adore ice cream and now I'm going to want it all night. And for the record, my favorite is German Chocolate Cake.”
“That’s an ice cream or a cake?” he asked.
“Both. But if you ever have the flavor as an ice cream,” I rubbed my stomach, “You’ll think you died and went to heaven. It’s....a...maz...ing.”
“I promise that when we dock, I’ll do my best to find you the biggest ice cream cone they sell,” he said.
“But that's a week away. What are we going to do until then?” I pouted.
He laughed. “I did say I love snacks. I might not have ice cream, but I’m sure there is something that you’ll find tempting.”
Besides you?No matter how much I love ice cream, there’s something else on this boat I’d rather have.
“There is.”
“What is that?” he asked.
Say it. Just say it.It was harder than I thought, but I didn’t want a missed opportunity.
“A kiss.”There. I said it.Now it was up to him to deliver.
He cleared his throat. “I...just so happen to have one of those.” Leaning closer to me, he kissed me gently. It ended too quickly.
When he sat back, I said, “That was nice, but like an ice cream, that was just a taste. I...I want more.”
Was I being too bold? Would it be a turn-off for him? He knew me from before when I wasn’t so confident. But this was new for me. I’d never...dated, so making the first move was really out of character for me. If he turned me down, I’d wish that there was a rock I could crawl under. But I wouldn’t forgive myself for not trying.
Declan pushed his plate aside, then did the same with mine. Wrapping his arm around my waist, he pulled me onto his lap. My pulse raced with anticipation. When his lips claimed mine, heat rushed through my veins and every cell in my body felt more alive than ever before.
