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“What?” I try to look over her shoulder.
She shakes her head. “These are reviews.”
I furrow my brow. “Really? What do they say?”
“Listen,” she starts reading again. “When I came here, I fucked, and then I returned home.”
I snort. She keeps reading, “Here I fucked many girls.”
“Satisfied customer. Did he leave a five star rating?” I ask.
She chuckles. “No stars unfortunately. Next guy said, I fucked splendidly.”
She giggles as she reads more. “Apparently the frescos we saw the other day were like a menu for the brothel services. Wives didn’t do those things.”
I scratch my neck. This is all getting to be a bit much. Maybe we should just go out on the boat again and stop looking at erotic art together? I didn’t think we’d talk about fucking at Pompeii. Jesus.
“Come on,” she motions me to follow her inside. We look at one of the rooms. It’s cramped with just a stone bed.
“That doesn’t look comfortable,” I say, looking around.
“Well, they’d put a mattress on it – straw or down,” she explains.
I’m still staring at it. “That’s not much better.”
She shakes her head. “Sometimes you don’t even know how good you have it. I can’t imagine using a straw mattress.”
“Sounds itchy,” I say.
“Super itchy,” she agrees.
We walk through the rest of the brothel without talking and then she says, “Let’s find the others.”
She checks her phone. “They are heading to the amphitheater. We’ll meet them there.”
Amphitheater. I’m really hoping there’s nothing erotic there. Sounds safe enough. But who knows – maybe that’s where they had the orgies? Next time I go on a Sterling vacation, I want to go to Amish country or something.
“Sounds good to me,” I say, happy to move away from the brothel.
We start walking. She motions in front of us and says, “It’s beautiful here. Look at that view of the mountain.”
“Yeah. That’s a beautiful mountain – until it kills you.”
She shudders. “Right.”
She turns to me. “Were you nervous yesterday?”
We went up to the top of Mount Vesuvius yesterday. “That the volcano would erupt?”
She nods.
I look over at it in the distance. “It can kill us just as easily here.”
She makes a face. “That’s true. Maybe we should be worried?”
“I think we’re fine,” I say.
“It was smoking yesterday,” she points out.
