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“Shiloh Rum Do.”
“Mommy, Wyatt is crying!” Alexis yells from the other room. “Shut up, bitches, I can’t hear the show.”
“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, she’s got a mouth on her. Mom will wash her mouth out with soap if she hears that.”
I roll my head back and forth against his chest. “She’s like a parrot picking up all the bad words.”
Lex smiles. “I’ve got this. Go take a hot bath and relax.”
I nod, relenting, because suddenly I feel exhausted. When did life get so complicated?
Chapter 11
Connor
I arrive homefrom work around midnight and walk into a crime scene. Pausing in the living room archway, I take in my surroundings. It looks like a bomb went off in here. TJ is passed out on our sectional, with Kiki’s youngest, Drew, draped across his chest, snoring. Colorful marker is all over the side of TJ’s face, down his arms, and there’s paint in his hair.
I hold my fist to my mouth and try not to laugh. Pizza boxes and plates with half-eaten crusts are strewn across the coffee table, juice boxes are toppled over, leaking sticky liquid down the side of the table, and there’s popcorn all over the couch and floor. A massive blanket fort is set up in front of the television. I step over and lift a blanket to discover Kiki’s eldest hellion, Chase, curled up under a blanket, hugging a realistic-looking baby, also covered in marker. Something moves beside him and I jump back.Is that a cat?
I walk back over and nudge TJ while I pick up the remote and flip off the movie they were watching.
“I swear, Officer, he was in my care the whole time,” TJ mumbles in his sleep.
“TJ.” I shake his shoulder.
“Gladys, don’t hang up,” he yelps, sitting straight up.
“Babe, it’s me. I’m home.”
TJ blinks rapidly and covers his hand with his chest while I gently pick up Drew, who’s a sack of potatoes next to him on the couch, and walk him down to the guest room. I tuck him into the bed and check his breathing because he hasn’t made a peep with the transition. He surprises me by suddenly rolling over, his eyes fluttering open. I make a shushing sound and he grabs his blankie, sticks his thumb in his mouth, and closes his eyes. Lights out.
“I must have crashed.” TJ startles me. Standing in the doorway, he runs a hand over his hair, grimacing as he pulls popcorn out of it.
“I didn’ know we were havin’ the boys over for a sleepover.”
“I didn’t realize you were working so late.”
“I texted you. Mac called in sick, so I had to stay.” I kiss him before sliding past, heading toward the living room.
“Ah, well, that explains it. Chase hid my phone, and my watch died. You should have emailed me.”
“Emailed you?” I laugh. “My bad. Next time I’ll send a text, call, email, and let the post office know.” I pick up the pizza boxes and set them on the counter. “Funny thing, I swear I saw a cat in the tent with Chase, but it’s not Oreo or the spazzy white one.”
TJ nibbles on his thumbnail. “Don’t be mad.”
“TJ.” I hang my head and shake it before grabbing a wet rag to clean up the spilled juice.
“You said we should get a puppy, but they’re a lot of work.”
I pause in my cleaning and look up. “That didn’t equate to getting a cat.”
TJ holds his hands up. “But a cat is easy. And I know you’re not allergic because we’ve been around Kiki’s cats, and I thought it would be a good start in our baby plan. The boys and I went to the Humane Society this afternoon. Chase wanted to name him Mr. Poop, which Drew thought was hysterical, but I said we should wait for you to help pick out a name. Please don’t let it be Mr. Poop. Can you imagine Nana Rose knitting a poop emoji on a sweater for him?”
“Hmph,” I grumble while I clean up the popcorn. TJ fluffs the pillows and cautiously looks over at me. I straighten up and fold my arms over my chest. “Ye know, a cat is not comparable to adopting a baby.”
“Iknow, but I wanted to show you I can take care of a living creature.” He plops himself down on the couch, his eyes suddenly widening. “Crap, where’s Benjamin Blueberry? Shit, shit, shit.” He flips a couch cushion and then kneels on the floor to look underneath.
“Is Benjamin Blueberry the cat?”
