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I bite the inside of my cheek, staring off at the red door of the restaurant.
Somehow, everything in my life seems to come back to the church. Whenever I think I don’t need my faith the same way, the church catches my fall every time. Bringing Ivy there will undoubtedly stir curiosity with Ruiz. I can’t seem to be within inches of this woman without my body sounding off the litany of sins running through my head. But like her, I can’t think of anywhere else I could possibly take her.
I slowly nod. “I know of a place you can stay for a while.”
25
Ivy
Damon parks the car in the small lot beside the rectory building and cuts the engine. His silence during the whole ride over tells me this doesn’t sit well with him. I imagine finding Philippe weighs heavy on him, as well, so perhaps it has little to do with me, but he seems to have grown wearier over the last half hour.
“Look, if this is going to get you into trouble ...”
“It won’t get me into trouble. The church is a sanctuary for those seeking asylum. It was mine for a long time.”
The building stands dark and quiet as we exit the vehicle, and I follow Damon around a small paved path to a backdoor. He fumbles through keys until he finds the one for the door, and opens it onto a dark hallway inside. “Ruiz occupies the upper level,” he whispers. “To avoid any suspicion, I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“That doesn’t sound very comfortable for the longterm.”
“It won’t be longterm.”
On the right, we pass a workout room filled with equipment and free weights. Further down the hall, he comes to a stop in front of two bedrooms.
“Can’t you sleep in there?”
“Too close.”
“Ah, yes. My sinful lust might seep through the walls, and you’ll be masturbating all night.”
“Ivy ...” His voice holds a warning, and one glance into his sad eyes confirms that something is wrong.
“Philippe?”
His brows come together as he lets his gaze fall from mine. “He used to greet me every night that I’d come home. Sometimes, it felt like Isabella, when she’d come sit on my lap, while I worked.” He clears his throat and enters the room ahead of me, setting my suitcase down on the floor. “I’ll let you get settled.”
“I’m sorry. For Philippe. He’s with Isabella now, though. Right? In eternal paradise?” I speak with caution, because I know, in spite of my Catholic upbringing, those thoughts don’t always bring me comfort. They don’t always steal away the selfish desire to have the one I love here beside me.
He nods, though, and offers a slight smile when he looks back at me. “Yes, I’m certain of it.”
“So … I guess I’m going to try to get some sleep. Whatever sleep I can tonight.”
“Yes, of course. And … please don’t walk around in just a T-shirt.”
The idea that he’d even have to say that irritates the shit out of me. “Don’t worry. I’m only a whore for assholes. Ruiz is safe.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Ignoring him, I make my way toward the bed, but at the tight grip of my arm, my body falls into attack mode. I spin around and throw my arms out to push him back, but he grips my other wrist. Wriggling to get loose is futile with this man, who hardly puts much effort into holding me still.
“Listen to me.” It’s worse that his voice carries an eerie calm that is naturally threatening, yet commanding, at the same time. “I need you to lay low. To be invisible. Not because I think you’re a whore, and I’m sorry if I implied that. In the last few weeks, only two things have come to mean something to me, and one of them was hung by his neck tonight. I don’t want to find you that way. I won’t let it happen, hear me?”
There’s an ardent fury in his eyes, and if I stare long enough, I swear his pupils are dilating.
In a matter of a week, I’ve witnessed two occasions when the man has clearly lost his shit. In the strength of his grip, I can feel myself shaking with my frustration, but I nod and smile, curious as to what it means when he says he won’t watch me hang. What is the unseen plot behind his eyes?
“Please tell me you’re not giving serious consideration to going after him.”
“I’m not giving serious consideration, Ivy.” He releases me, taking a step back toward the door behind him. “It’s already been decided.”
