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“They never said anything to me.”
“Yeah, well, it’s not how they are, is it? Can you remember the night you graduated, and they flew straight home after dinner. They talked non-stop about how you were going to take the medical world by storm, and you did.”
“Giles, can you give Beck and I a moment please?”
Giles nods silently at my father before standing and walking past me, leaving just me and my old man.
“He’s right. We’re proud of you, Beckham. I know we never showed it but you going out and following your dream is impressive.”
“I always thought you were disappointed in me.”
“Never, son. You literally save lives with your hands, Beckham. How could any parent be disappointed with that?”
My father’s eyes travel back to my mom and I see how much this is hurting him. I always thought my parents just rubbed along together but now I see he really loves her. “You never told me.”
“I know and for that I’m sorry. After Mr. Fincham died of a heart attack in front of you, we worried that perhaps you didn’t have the fortitude to be a doctor. You were broken, Beckham.”
I remember that day like it was yesterday. I was in fifth grade when my teacher suddenly dropped dead of a heart attack in front of the whole class. I felt so helpless, so scared, and when my father sat me down and explained Mr. Fincham’s heart was weak and they couldn’t fix him, I was even more scared. I never wanted to feel that way again. In many ways, his death is what prompted me to become a heart surgeon. “I felt so helpless.”
“You were always such a caring boy with a big heart. I knew you’d never be happy in the corporate world.” His eyes move from my mom and clash with mine, and I see pride and love in them. “Without men and women like you, my Margarete wouldn’t stand a chance.”
“She might well face challenges, Dad.” I want to warn him so he doesn’t get his hopes up.
“I know, but she’s here because of men like you. I’m proud of you, son.”
I link my fingers over my belly not knowing what to feel right now. “Thank you, that means a lot.”
“It’s long overdue.”
“Do you mind if I ask why now?”
My father shrugs. “Life is short, and sometimes things need to be said while they can.”
“Well, I appreciate it.”
He gives me a half smile and then silence fills the room, but it’s not uncomfortable. I ponder on his words and know I need to speak to Xander.
22: Beck
The last fewdays have been hellish, but also healing for me and my family. I never expected in a hundred years for those words to come out of my father’s mouth. Moreover, I didn’t know I needed them as much as I did. Approval is a funny thing, especially parental approval, and I thought I was okay with not having it, but now I have it, I feel lighter.
“You’re smiling again.”
I turn to look at Ryker as he walks into the office at Ruin. Ryker has been here with me for every phase of my adult life and I trust him with my life. “I’m happy. My mom is being released later today, I have the woman I love in my bed and Xander is…” I don’t know how to finish that sentence. Xander has been amazing. He’s supported me in ways I never expected. Making sure I eat, that my family has privacy, and allowing me to be a son rather than the person taking care of everyone.
“Xander is…?” Ryker rolls his hand for me to continue, as he slumps in the chair opposite my desk.
“Perfect.”
“You love him?”
Ryker hasn’t always found it easy to navigate human emotions. Coding and algorithms, he understands in his sleep, but sometimes the obvious emotions are lost on him. Although he seems to understand when a woman wants to fuck him easily enough.
“I do.”
He locks his fingers together over his chest and rubs his bottom lip, deep in thought and I wait. He’s the thinker, not one to speak of serious things for the sake of it.
“Does he know?”
