AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I guide her to the closed lid of the toilet and start the shower, testing the water with my fingers until it’s warm. Standing her up, I strip her of her worn Walmart pajama muumuu and look away to give her privacy as she removes her bra and underwear.
“I’ll be in the bedroom cleaning up.” I leave the bathroom and change her soiled, bloody bedding.
The second I hear the water shut off, I’m back in the bathroom, holding open a ratty towel and covering her as she steps out of the shower. We’ve been here before, so I don’t say anything as I sit her back on the toilet and dig out the first aid kit.
She hisses as I clean the cut on her forehead and below her eye with an alcohol wipe, but I keep going. I bandage them before inspecting her arms and legs, finding so many bruises, I shudder. I gently rub some arnica cream on them and brush her hair. Once I’ve done all I can, I bring her some clean clothes and leave her again.
Ten minutes later, she comes out of the bathroom looking not good but better than before.
“Come here,” I say, holding open the clean comforter. She climbs in, her eyes closing the second her head hits the pillow. “What happened?”
“What always happens?” Her tone is clipped, not something I usually hear from her. “Ray lost at the casino last night and came home in a pissy mood.”
“And I wasn’t here,” I fill in.
“No.”
“I’m sorry,” I say, though I’m not sure I mean it. She didn’t have to be here; she could’ve been safe with me. She chose to come back.
“Thank you for getting me cleaned up. You can go now.”
“You said Ray wasn’t coming home?”
“No.”
“Okay, then I’ll stay.” I stand and cover her up. “Do you need anything?”
“No. I just need some rest.”
Even though she can’t see me, I nod. “I’ll be back with some painkillers and water.”
She reaches out, grabbing my hand. “You look good, Vivi. Healthy and happy.”
“I am.” I smile, but it’s small. I’m pissed at myself for choosing to believe she was okay while I was off enjoying my new life. I should’ve been checking on her. There’s no excuse.
“Good. That’s all I ever wanted for you.”
“I know, Mom. I’ll come check on you in a little while.”
As I clean, I refocus my mind. I’m glad I stopped things between Colin and me last night. He isn’t my priority. Getting Mom and me far away from here is, and had I gone further with him, it only would’ve made things more difficult. But goddamn, it was a good kiss.
I touch my mouth the same way I did last night, wishing I could still feel him. I’ve never experienced anything as powerful as the moment his lips met mine. It was as though the entire world fell away. A bomb could’ve gone off in the next room, and I’m not certain I would’ve noticed. It was perfect, and I’m so grateful I’ll have that moment to look back on when things get hard again because they will. For people like me, it’ll always be hard.
I scrub the dishes, tidy up the kitchen, and hand wash the floors before filling a glass with water and taking it to Mom, along with some aspirin. Since she’s asleep, I leave it on her nightstand and get back to cleaning.
It’s dark out by the time I finish, and I get Mom out of bed to join me for a simple supper of canned soup and a cheese sandwich. Apparently, she hasn’t kept up on shopping either, since the cupboards are nearly bare.
“What have you been doing while I’ve been gone?” I ask.
“I’ve just been so tired. I tried to keep up on things, but it just feels like too much right now.”
“That’s because you’re depressed,” I say.
“No,” she scoffs.
“Have you been drinking?” I ask carefully because she’s never been a big drinker. Still, she’s gone through periods of overindulging, and there’s no way the number of empty bottles I found is from Ray alone.
“A little.” She squeezes my knee under the table. “I miss you. We’ve never been apart from each other, and maybe I got a little lonely.”
