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My heart ached for her, despite how much she’d hurt me. No one should be faced with losing a child. No matter what, Teagan didn’t deserve that.
“Do you need money?” I was playing professionally and one thing I had, was money. My father and mother were retired and big into philanthropy. Maybe one of them knew someone at a national registry and could bump the little girl up on the list. “I’ll call my dad, and maybe he can help find a donor…” My father’s electrical business was modest, but he donated to many charities and knew a lot of people in high places.
“Um…” She reached out and grabbed my hand so hard it hurt. My fingers threaded with hers. Despite it all, I wanted to ease her pain. Tears fell in silent rivers from her eyes. “Chase, will you test? Please?”
“I will, but what about Jensen and his famil—” I began.
She shook her head, her fingers almost crushing mine as her eyes closed. “No.”
“No?” I was confused. “He won’t test?” I couldn’t wrap my mind around it. Jensen might be a lot of things, but he wasn’t heartless.
“They won’t match. Jensen isn’t her father.”
The air left my chest. “What?”
“Jensen isn’t Remi’s father.”
My mind raced and my lungs constricted. Did Teagan screw some random man?
“Chase, please don’t be angry.” She handed me her phone the screen illuminated with a picture of a beautiful little girl with two missing front teeth, glossy deep brown hair, and white porcelain skin like her mothers with a healthy pink flush to her cheeks. Laughter danced in the dark green orbs… “I’m so sorry.”
I started to shake again as my vision blurred as I looked at the photo. “Those are my eyes,” I said flatly. “My eyes.”
She nodded as her voice broke on a sob. “I know. Isn’t she just beautiful?”
“You kept this from me all this time? You married Jensen and let him raise my kid? How could you do this to me, Teagan?” An invisible vacuum sucked the air from my lungs. “I can’t fucking believe this is happening.” I felt like I was a spectator watching some nightmare unfold before me. If it weren’t for the insatiable burn that ate up all of my oxygen, I wouldn’t have believed it was real.
“I didn’t know what to do, Chase. I knew if I told you I was pregnant, you’d leave London and your team behind.”
“Damn right I would have, Teagan!” I yelled the words so loudly she jumped in her seat.
“It was my right to know! Jesus Christ! I’m…” I shook my head in disbelief. “It should have been my choice! What right did you have to keep this from me? What fucking right?” Rage filled me at the same time that my heart broke into a thousand pieces. I had a daughter that I’d been robbed of and she was very sick. “Why in the hell didn’t you call me when she first got sick, at least?” Tears rolled down my face. “You gave my child to another man! How could you, Teagan? I thought we loved each other!”
“We did. I thought I was doing the right thing. I loved you enough to… let you have your dream. I still love you, Chase!”
“My dream… was you! You were the goddamn dream! Soccer is a game. A career, and that’s all! How could you not know that? Nothing meant more to me than you!” I swiped at the wetness on my face as my heart shattered. “When you married Jensen, I didn’t care if I lived or died! I couldn’t fathom why. My whole world ended; I hated everything! I didn’t think you could hurt me more, until this moment. You sit there and tell me you still love me when you kept my child from me?”
She was sobbing full force as I tried to pull my hand from hers, but she tightened her hold. “No, Chase, pl-please,” she cried. “Remi could die. I can’t go through that without you. Chase!” Her head dropped to my shoulder above our joined hands. “Please. I didn’t give her to Jensen. I didn’t. She knows he’s not her father. She kn-knows…”
I leaned my head back in the seat. I was drowning, my heart exploding. I’d never hurt as bad but hearing her anguish only made it worse. “But you could let her go through her life without me? I’m so mad at you, Teagan,” I spat out, even as my arms closed around her shaking body. “I want to hate you, it hurts so goddamn much!”
Her hands found their way into my hair at the back of my head, clutching as she cried into my shoulder and I found myself smoothing hers down her back as we both sobbed into each other. I wanted to hate her, but somehow holding Teagan eased the devastating ache. Finally, her tears subsided and I found my voice. My instincts wanted to comfort and kiss her, to let myself feel, but my heart was still breaking.
“I want to meet her.”
Teagan nodded and pulled back. The tears still clung to her lashes as she searched my expression. “Of course. Can you forgive me?” She held both sides of my face in her hands and I wanted to lean into one of them. Again I resisted and pulled away abruptly.
“I don’t know yet. What you’ve done is…”
“Unforgivable.” It was the truth. “I know.” She nodded. “I’ll understand if you can’t.”
I ran a hand through my hair as she moved awkwardly back into the driver’s seat to put it into reverse. “Is her name short for something? It’s unusual.”
“Yes. Remilia Victoria.”
I sat in silence as it sank in. “Roma and Amelia?” I asked incredulously.
“Yes.” Teagan’s response was whisper quiet.
