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I send the message, then stand, pace pointlessly. I’m too full of savage energy to sit. I feel like I should be on a hunt, earning sustenance for my woman. I should be doing something primal and productive for our family.
Tell me you mean that,she texts.
I’ve never meant anything more. I’d give away all my success if it meant we could be together. I’d sacrifice anything.
This better not be a joke because I feel the same. I want it all. I never thought you’d want it too. I want to be your wife. I want to be the mother of your children.
The second I read her message, I type a response.
I need to see you now. I can’t wait until tomorrow.
I’m having a movie night with Mom. I figured it was the least I could do before tomorrow.
I groan, leaning against my kitchen island. My body has responded furiously to her words as if ready to claim her. It’s a version of what I’ve experienced all week, but it’s much fiercer now that I know she wants it all, too.
I’m being completely serious, Zoey.
I believe you.
You need to understand these aren’t just romantic words. This isn’t the “honeymoon period” people sometimes talk about. I’ve never felt more certain about anything in my life, even when I was in the service. You. Are. My. Woman.
And you. Are. My. Man. I swear, Jax. I’m shaking right now.
I want to hear your voice.
Oh, God, I wish you could call me, but Mom’s just returned from the store.
Then tomorrow,I type.We have something concrete to tell Mallory now. We don’t just want to date. We want it all.
I’m not sure if that will make it easier or harder.
Whatever happens, I’ll never stop feeling this way.
I have to go,she replies.Thank you for telling me that. I’ll see you tomorrow.
* * *
I’m at my office in the city since it’s closer to Zoey’s address.
All day, I’ve been staring at the Word document, trying to focus on the story’s arc and not the arc of my life. Zoey and I have been texting all day, repeating what we revealed last night, talking about kids and a wedding.
How many children do you want?
As many as you can give me.
That’s our last exchange, and I smile as I read her response, but then a new message comes in, and my smile fades.
Mom just called me. She says she’s going to be a few hours late. I’m so worried she’s going to get drunk. She seemed shifty on the phone. She seemed like she’s trying to do anything to get out of this meeting.
I have to see you anyway,I reply.I’ll come over, and we’ll wait for her. Maybe she wants some time to herself before we get started.
I can’t go any longer without seeing you, either.I’m on my way home now. Well, I’m about to start the car. Meet me there?
My heart pounds at the same time as my balls throb, my mind expanding with thousands of vignettes from the life we’re going to live.
IfMallory comes home, andifshe gives us her blessing. Damn, this is all so shaky.
I’m on my way.
