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“‘It doesn’t matter’?” Celine stares at me like I’ve grown three new heads. “Holy shit, Taylor.Of courseit matters. It matters to me, it probably matters to Ilarion, and it should matter to you, too.”
“The only thing I care about is you. Everything I’ve done was for you.”
She lifts a brow. All the shock and heartache is compounded into that one eyebrow. It’s the only sign that her world is falling apart.
She nods once and then, without warning, flings the snow globe across the room. It hits the wall right next to the windows and shatters. I gasp, my body lurching towards the wall as though I can somehow stop it, reverse time, magically put the snow globe back together. I react as though the globe is a person I can save.
As if it’s a future I almost had.
Then I catch myself. I stop short and look at my sister. She’s Arctic fury in the flesh. The coldest wind I’ve ever felt, tearing me to frozen pieces.
“You’re the reason he couldn’t love me back,” she whispers. “You.”
I blink and a fat tear runs down my cheek. “I tried not to love him at all,” I croak, hoping that some part of my explanation will save us. “I tried so hard. I thought hating him was the answer.”
Celine snorts. “There’s a fuzzy line between love and hate. You should have tried indifference.” She shakes her head. “Why didn’t you tell me before you left?”
“You chose him.” I’m surprised that my guilt is fading into anger. Bit by bit, word by word, I’m starting to finally understand what Ilarion has been trying to tell me this whole time. “Even after Dad told you everything. The spying, his betrayal, the fact that Ilarion only approached you and asked you to marry him as insurance, as revenge—and you still fucking chose him.You,Cee. You chose a man who didn’t love you over your own fucking family.”
Celine’s bottom lip quivers almost imperceptibly. “I believed, even then, that he was a good man.”
“And what do you believe now?”
She smolders. “I believe that he didn’t tell me any of this because he was protecting you.”
“No, Cee. He’s not. He never has been. If he had his way, you would have known right then and there at the engagement party.”
Conflict wars across her face. She’s trying to justify everything with the reality that neither of us can deny. Not anymore. I know that expression because I’ve seen it in the mirror for literal years on end.
“I thought it would be better if I disappeared,” I admit. “Especially since…”
Oh, shit.I said too much.
Fear pumps through my chest so hard that I can barely keep my focus on her. But she waits patiently. Then, seconds of silence later, realization clears the frown on her face.
“Oh my god,” she breathes. “How did I not see it? Adam.He’s Ilarion’s.”
I swallow hard. “I found out I was pregnant the day you announced you were engaged. I didn’t know a thing about your fiancé. And I didn’t think announcing a surprise pregnancy at your engagement party was even remotely appropriate. So, I showed up with Mom and Dad, and you introduced us to your fiancé, and it was…him.”
Celine nods in slow motion. “I saw the two of you talking at the party,” she admits. “It looked as though you were familiar, but I just assumed you were getting to know each other for my sake. But then the Bellasios attacked…”
And just like that, all the fight leaves her body like a heavy sigh.
“Were you going to tell me? Ever?”
I hesitate, trying to figure out if there was ever any possibility of coming clean if the world hadn’t caved in on itself. “I don’t know, Cee. I’d like to think I would have. But…”
“But?”
I take a deep breath. Time for some actual fucking honesty. “But…after Alec, I didn’t want to see you so hurt again. I wanted to be the one to sacrifice for you.”
She shakes her head. “Why?”
“Because you were always there for everyone. You were the one taking care of me when I was sick. You were the one taking care of Mom whenshewas sick. You talked Dad through the worst of his depression and cooked for us all when everyone was too tired to move and you moved back home without being asked and you never, ever made any of it seem like a burden. You deserved to be happy, Cee. I wanted to give you a happy ending. I…I still do.”
She stares at me for a moment, and I can see the remnants of her anger fade. “Don’t you understand, Taylor?” she says. “It wasn’t in your power to give me a happy ending. You don’t get to control how other people feel. You don’t have the right to tell Ilarion to love me, and you don’t have the right to deny him his son. Or Adam his father.” Her eyes veer to the broken pieces of glass on the floor. Then she takes a deep breath and that icy mask of hers settles back into place. “Come on now. We have a ball to attend.”
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