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He didn’t exactly push off from the wall. But she heard the shift in his breathing, the energy beneath the tremendous stillness he seemed to be made of. “Now what, Starling?”
She stilled when there was just enough gap between their bodies to let air pass. So close that the heat radiating from him was like a whip, branding her flesh. “Do you still want to...kiss me? Or are you worried you’ll find reality to be a poor imitation of your memory?”
CHAPTER FIVE
CHRISTIANTOOKAdeep breath. The scent of her skin greeted him like an old friend, something so inherentlyherthat his lungs expanded, greedily taking it in. Silky tendrils fell away from the knot on top of her head, caressing that delicate jawline. Her skin shimmered silky soft. The deep V of her robe hinted at a cleavage he wanted to bury his face in. Her eyes...glittered with unhidden desire. With her makeup gone, he could see the dark shadows under her eyes, but there was still a glow to her face. There was vulnerability and strength in the set of her features as she looked up at him that was like a shot of liquid fire straight to his veins.
Damn, she was...bold. Bold and beautiful and better than any memory his messed-up mind could conjure. She was warmth and life and brightness that made him want to go down on his knees and give thanks.
He tugged the reins of his self-control tighter around himself. “I don’t remember you being a tease.”
She laughed, and he saw the pulse fluttering rapidly at her neck. She was just as agitated and nervous as he was and yet, she was here. She didn’t back down. “I’m not bluffing, Christian.”
He grunted, fisting his hands by his sides.
Her gaze trailed up his body, with that same boldness.
“Priya... This isn’t a good idea,” he said, his voice all hoarse and forbidding. God, what a coward he was...
“Can I come closer?” she whispered, apparently not at all intimidated. “Can I touch you, Christian?” Her tongue flicked out to lick her lower lip, her gaze drinking in his chest as if she was parched. “Please.”
Something in Christian broke, some invisible wall he hadn’t even known he was holding up. Protecting himself or her, he had no idea.
“Yes,” he muttered, desperate to see what she’d dare to do. Curious to see how far she could push him.
Her arms came around his neck first, fingers clasping against the nape of his neck. The tips teased the edges of his hair, sending shivers down his spine. Slowly, she fell against him, until her breasts were flattened against his chest. Until her flat stomach pressed up against his abdomen. Her thighs were shaking against his, demanding to be straddled, until he widened his stance. And then she was fully leaning against him, pressed up so hard that he could hear her heart thumping away against his own. Every muscle in him clenched at the glorious, full-body contact, at how soft and warm and delicious she was against him. He uttered a hoarse, needy groan.
An echo of that same sound fell from her mouth as she settled herself against him to her satisfaction. Her face came to the open V of his shirt, her breath teasing the hair on his chest. “Put your arms around me,” she demanded, her voice all deep and fluttery.
He raised a brow and refused to comply.
Her mouth made a pout. “You’re no fun anymore.”
“Is that what this is?” he demanded grumpily, every ounce of his willpower and energy going into staying still, into not devouring her whole like he wanted to.
Her lashes flicked down, her palms spread greedily on his abdomen, stroking up and down, over and around, as if she was frantically mapping the terrain of his body and couldn’t stop. “Maybe we both need a reminder.”
“Of what?”
“That—” she leaned her cheek against his chest “—this is a good thing that I can hear your heart thudding in my ear. That you’re here and I’m here.”
When he was holding her like this, when his hands were full of her warmth and softness, it did feel like a good thing. His hands betrayed him first. They moved over her back, patting, smoothing, stroking, relearning her, and she arched into his touch, her breath coming in shallow strokes. “Then why does it feel like I’ve lost more than I’ve gained?” he said, angry with himself. So...furiously powerless. It was like a raging fire inside him that had no outlet.
Her throat bobbed up and down as she swallowed hard, her hands inching back over his shoulders to the nape of his neck. She pressed it, demanding he look at her. Her eyes shimmered with unshed tears. “I felt like that once. That day the doctor confirmed that I was pregnant, all I wanted was to crawl under the sheets and never come out. I wanted to simply let Mama and Ben take over. One moment, the baby felt like a gift, and the next... Memories of how we left things between us the last time we saw each other would eat through me. But then I thought of you and Jai and how you were both gone and I... I was disgusted by how I was wasting the chance at living that I’d been given. I was damned if I was going to let everyone else take over my child’s upbringing. So I decided then and there it would be a new beginning. I would be a different Priya.Iwould dictate the direction my life and my child’s life would take, not anyone or anything else. Make this choice too, Christian. Take the reins in your own hands and make this a new beginning.”
Her words were a balm to his soul, her touch a benediction that filled up all the empty spaces inside him. He tugged at a strand of silky hair, marveling at the woman she’d become. “What shall I do with you, Pree?” he said, his voice gentle and needy. The question came from deep in his soul.
“Kiss me,” she said, her teeth gently nipping his chin. Her smile was a prize. “I want to kiss you. I’ve wanted to kiss you for a long time. Actually, I’ve wanted to do a lot of things, but I’ll settle for a kiss for now.”
He grunted.
Her eyes shone like jewels in her face. “I think that’s a grunt of assent, Mikkelsen. See, I’m beginning to understand this new language you communicate in.”
His mouth dried, his synapses pretty much fried from all the contact.
“After everything you’ve been through to find your way back to us,” she whispered, “after everything we’ve been through...” Her lashes flicked down and up again. “...we deserve a reward, don’t you think?”
He grinned more confidently, cupping her hip with one palm. “Are you my reward, Pree?”
