AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I paused, my hand hovering over a box of tampons.
There had been so much else going on lately that I simply hadn’t thought about my period. But standing here with this box in front of me was triggering memories of the last time I had reached for it.
And now I was doing math.
Had that really beenseven weeks ago?
It had. It had been right around the time I’d started working at the FBI, which was at least eight weeks ago. I’d have to look at the calendar to be sure.
Fuck. Suddenly the weird, nauseous way I’d been feeling since turning in my report was making a lot more sense.
It wasn’t guilt at all.
But,no. I couldn’t bepregnant, could I?
Brian and I weren’t always safe. When we were locked in together, it was not like we had condoms.
No, we hadn’t, but I was on birth control!
Birth control can fail.
My hand was shaking.
I had a pregnancy test. I always kept one on hand, even though my friends in college had made fun of me for it. I had always said it was a better thing to have and not need than to not have and have to make a frantic trip to a drugstore and buy one from some bored teenager.
Fuck, was I ever glad for that policy now.
I unwrapped the test. I had a strong feeling I knew what it was going to say, but I tried to take deep breaths and control my anxiety as I went through the familiar steps and then laid it on the edge of the sink.
I couldn't wait to watch for the results come up, so I left the bathroom and went into the kitchen.
What was I going to do if the test was positive?
The test was going to be positive. It explained everything I had been going through lately.
I opened the freezer and let the ice-cold air blast against my face, but it did nothing to relax me. I watched the clock over the stove as the minutes ticked by—the last minutes before, I was sure, my life would inevitably change forever.
And then I went back into the bathroom and looked at the little plus sign on the stick.
Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.
I rested my hand on my stomach.
I had always wanted children. Of course, I had never imagined it going down like this.
A part of me, even considering the weird circumstances, was happy about this. Glad that I was going to walk away with something positive.
At that moment, I knew I was going to keep this baby, even though I had no desire to welcome Brian back into my life after the way he had treated me. Even though I knew my wild attraction to him made it very advisable to just keep him at a distance.
And I was going to have to tell him, of course. I couldn’t give birth to his child without him finding out about it. We lived in the same city. My father—the baby’s grandfather—was his best friend. If I had a child, Brian would eventually know about it, and he was no idiot. He was capable of doing the math just as much as I was.
He’d know it was his.
Feeling like I was on autopilot, I finished packing my things and returned to the car to return to my father’s place. I left the pregnancy test on my bathroom sink. I had a feeling I was going to need to see it again tomorrow to reassure myself that I hadn’t dreamed all this.
Dad was standing over a pot of chicken soup when I arrived, but he did a double-take when he saw me. “Jesus, Al,” he said. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“I do?”
