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I followed her out to the car. The silence was heavy between us.
“I’ll see you in a few days,” Alice said after we’d packed her trunk.
“I’m hoping to get away and stop by your workshop.”
“You don’t need to do that. You’re busy with things here.” She didn’t say Felicia’s name, but I knew that’s what she meant.
“If it were just me and Maggie, we’d be there without question. I want to be there to support you.”
Alice smiled sadly. “It’s okay.”
She was used to people not coming through for her, and I refused to be that guy. Even with my life up in the air, I needed to reassure her.
“It’s just a few days, then everything will go back to normal.” My words felt wrong on my tongue.
Alice smiled softly, but it didn’t quite meet her eyes. “Take care of yourself.”
Her words were distancing, and I didn’t like it.
“I’ll be there.”
Alice looked away. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep. You don’t know how things are going to go here, and Maggie needs you.”
Every night we’d spent together, we’d discussed my fears about Felicia’s visit. That Maggie would act weird around her mother, not knowing who she was or not wanting to spend time with her. I was almost positive Felicia hadn’t thought about it at all. She was so self-involved.
Alice moved toward the driver’s-side door, her shoulders rigid. “Speaking of, you need to get back inside. We talked about this.”
I touched her shoulder, wanting to do so much more. I wanted to hold her tight and reassure her that nothing could come between us, but neither of us believed that. Our relationship was tenuous, and this situation with Felicia was up in the air. It was too much.
Alice opened the door and climbed inside. “See you soon.”
Her words could mean anything—the workshop, next week, even around town. The thought of her never coming back to live in my house squeezed my heart painfully. She shut her door, not waiting for me to respond. Then she was backing up, and I couldn’t do anything but watch her helplessly, wishing she could stay.
I sighed, knowing Maggie needed me inside. I shouldn’t have left her for so long.
Inside, I found Maggie and Felicia locked in some sort of standoff in the kitchen.
“Everything okay?” I refocused on what mattered the most, my daughter, even if a piece of my heart had driven away. Was it wrong to want Alice by my side?
“Maggie won’t eat her dinner.”
Maggie crossed her arms over her chest. “I’m not hungry.”
I think it had something to do with the tension between the adults. “You want to read a book on the couch?”
Maggie nodded, and I picked her up to carry her to the couch. She was getting bigger, and I didn’t carry her around much, but we both needed the connection.
“You’re going to let her skip dinner?” Felicia asked, her hands on her hips.
I bristled. This was a bad idea. “Maggie needs to get used to you being here. Give her some time.”
“This isn’t about me. It’s her behavior and what you let her get away with.”
“Don’t talk like that in my house.” I kept my voice even. “Why don’t you put the plates in the oven to keep them warm? She’ll eat in a bit.”
Felicia grumbled but did as I asked while I read one of Maggie’s favorite picture books to her. With each word, she relaxed more. After four books, I asked, “Are you hungry now?”
She nodded, but her gaze darted to Felicia, who was standing in the kitchen watching us. I didn’t want her to take Maggie anywhere by herself, at least not until I was sure Maggie was okay with it, but at the same time, it felt wrong that she was standing in my kitchen, judging my parenting.
