Page 6 of Committed to Her

And now I hope that I’m not doing the same to him because I’m well aware that stings like a bitch. And the hurt never goes away. Just turns into a throbbing ache that becomes a part of your soul, all the way down to your bones.

I walk out the door and back to my car, feeling light-headed and struggling not to bawl my eyes out like I did at eighteen. Those days are gone now. I can’t look back, only move forward with what’s left of the pieces of me. The rest will stay with him. Where it’s always been.

CHAPTER4

Caleb

The next morning, I open my eyes and immediately close them, the light making a sunburst of pain explode in my head.

I knew I shouldn’t have those last few beers but after Val walked out the door and I saw her drive away, I didn’t give two damns about how I’d feel this morning. If I felt like shit it would just match how our little conversation went.

It could have gone better. Maybe.

Maybe it could have gone worse. I don’t know. All I know is that the little spitfire that I grew up with is hurting and my heart hurts just knowing that. Thinking that I may be the one that caused it is enough to break me.

But I think it’s more than that. Something else took away her spark but I wasn’t there to protect her, keep her safe from whatever the hell did it and that’s on me. I made a stupid decision to honor her parents’ wishes and it hurt my little love and I can’t forgive myself for that.

I shouldn’t go along with her grandmother’s plan but I know that I’m going to. If I can’t fix what already happened to her, I can damn sure protect her in the future. From now until I take my last breath, I will make sure that nothing ever hurts her again. Or I will destroy it.

My cell phone rings and I groan, rolling over to grab it off my nightstand. “Hello?” I ask, not recognizing the number.

“Tie one on last night, young man? I take it things didn’t go well with Valerie?”

Groaning, I sit up, waiting for the room to stop spinning. I smack my lips and try to ignore the way my mouth tastes. Like an old ashtray. Or feet. Not good. I fell into bed without brushing my teeth this morning.

“They could have gone better.” Understatement if I ever heard one.

She chuckles, a dry, raspy sound like she rarely laughs. I don’t know Hetty that well but I know that Val loves her. Even as she sometimes worries about what she’s up to. Hetty’s the kind of person that always has something up her sleeve and if you’re smart, you keep an eye on her, knowing that you might not like what she’s up to.

Valerie is smart. But right now she’s got no clue. I do and I have qualms about doing it. But I’m gonna be a selfish bastard and if it gets me my Val….well, call me a selfish bastard!

“They could have gone worse,” she snickers. “Valerie is a very stubborn woman. Did you talk to her at all?”

I nod my head even though she can’t see it through the phone. “I did. Not that I think it did any good. She was pretty firm in the fact that she doesn’t want anything to do with me.”

“You leave that with me. I’ll deal with her stubbornness.”

For just a second, I think about telling her to just leave Valerie alone. Until I remember her haunted eyes and I just can’t let her go. I need to make her whole again. If it’s possible to fix someone with the strength of your love, I intend to do it.

“Okay, Hetty. I’ll do my part. I’ll marry Val.” A thrill goes through me when I think about my Val with my name. Being mine for the rest of our lives.”

If I can keep her from kicking me in the balls and tearing my hair out when she finds out what Hetty and I are planning. I’m not kidding myself. She’s gonna be furious and I don’t blame her. But I can’t bear knowing that I hurt her and not fixing it. Not seeing her every day for the rest of our lives and not taking care of everything so that she’s never hurt again.

“Good. I’ll get the ball rolling with Val today and we’ll set the wedding up for this weekend.”

Gasping, I jerk upright. “So soon?”

“You bet, son. If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years, it’s when you’ve got a fish on the line, you don’t give it time to wriggle off the hook.”

“I think that you shouldn’t talk about your granddaughter like she’s a slippery fish, Hetty,” I say wryly, my lips quirking when I think about what Val would say about that.

“You know I love my granddaughter,” she says huskily. “She’s the only member of my family that I can tolerate for more than five minutes. She’s a good girl and she deserves to be happy. I don’t think she’ll ever be happy with anybody but you.”

A little flutter hits my chest and I rub my bare skin absently. “I hope you’re right because I can’t bear to hurt her again.”

“You wanna tell me why you hurt her the first time.”

“It’s a long story, Hetty, and it really doesn’t absolve what happened at the time or mend what it caused.”

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