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“No, you’re correct. But your first relationship sets a precedent for how you expect to be treated and the shit you’ll tolerate and the shit you won’t.”
Cars are zooming around us and I regret getting on the freeway when all I want to do is take in her expressions as we have this conversation. There was a time that I could read every one of her looks and I missed being so deeply in tune with her. I take the next exit just as she begins to speak. “You never cheated on me,” she says quietly. “To my knowledge, you never so much as looked at another woman. I was always the only woman you saw.”
“You still are.” The words leave my lips on their own accord.
“Yeah, okay.” She snorts and I frown at the thought that she doesn’t believe me.
“When have I ever lied to you?” I ask her.
“I’m just saying the thought that you haven’t looked at a woman in the past three years you’ve been gone is ridiculous.”
I pull into a parking lot of one of the lounges downtown. I didn’t want to go into one of the loud clubs, but I also wanted another drink and to keep her talking. “And if I haven’t?” Her eyes find mine and for a second, I feel like she’s going to press the issue. She’s going to ask if I dated someone since we’ve been apart, fucked someone, made love to someone, claimed someone the way I did her three years ago. I wonder if she can see the truth all over my face because her face snaps forward and she shakes her head. I get out of the car and this time I make it to her side of the car to open the door before she has a chance to stubbornly do it herself. I offer her my hand and she takes it on instinct before snatching it out of my hand the second she’s standing upright.
“Stop. You can’t…”
“Be a gentleman?” I finish for her because even women I wasn’t in love with would get the same treatment in terms of opening doors.
She licks her lips and my eyes drop to them tracing her full pout that’s coated with a layer of what looks like a tinted lip balm. It’s not bright or vibrant. It doesn’t look glossy, but just slick enough to keep my attention on her mouth. I find myself wondering if it’s flavored and what she’d taste like if I brushed my lips against them.
She begins walking toward the door and I follow behind her, my hands balled into fists as to not touch the small of her back to guide her. We are seated rather quickly given that it’s still on the earlier side of the night and it isn’t too crowded yet. We’re seated in a U-shaped booth with me seated in the center in hopes that she’d sit next to me. She sits on one of the sides and immediately orders a glass of water and a glass of Malbec. I order a Macallan 18 neat, my usual order before turning away from the overly flirtatious waitress. A look of satisfaction floods me when I see the look she’s still giving her long after she’s walked away.
“Jealous?” I ask, trying my best to keep the smug expression off of my face.
She turns to me and her beautiful eyes narrow into slits. “Did she not see me here?”
“So, yes.”
“No, it’s just… rude!” she exclaims.
“Maybe she doesn’t think we’re together given how far away you’re sitting,” I say, gesturing to the space that could fit two people comfortably. She huffs and tucks a hair behind her ear. “Your hair is longer.” I’ve been staring at it all night. She’s always had gorgeous hair and if anything, it’s gotten more beautiful. It’s full and healthy and has those natural waves that women damage their hair trying to obtain. “It’s beautiful.”
“Of course, you noticed,” she murmurs, more to herself but I hear it despite her low tone and the dull roar of the lounge. “Anything else?”
I narrow my eyes and wonder if this is some sort of test. I lean forward. “Are you asking if there’s anything else that’s different since the last time I saw you? If I noticed the tattoo peeking out from under the strap of your jumpsuit?” I point at the ink I’d never seen before. It’s sitting just below her clavicle, which means it must be small because it’s somewhat hidden beneath the strap of the halter strap that is probably only an inch wide. “That you don’t wear eyeliner anymore, just mascara and, quite frankly, that suits you better. You were nineteen the last time I saw you, so I don’t think you’re taller and your figure looks pretty much the same. You’ve always had a gorgeous shape and if you want me to comment further on that I can.” I give her a smile and her lips part and her teeth sink into them and if I’m not mistaken a quiet sigh leaves her. I swallow down a groan, wishing I could lick that pouty lip. “Is that a yes?” I raise an eyebrow at her. If she wants me to go down this road, I am more than willing to.
“It’s not a no…” She trails off and her cheeks pinken, probably in realization as to what she’s just said.
“This jumpsuit highlights your slim waist. I remember how I could grip your hips when you rode me. They fit my hands perfectly.” She swallows, her brown eyes not leaving mine not even to blink. “Every time you turned around in this tonight, my heart stopped. It hugs the curve of your delicious ass so perfectly. Since it’s a wide leg pant, I can’t really tell if those thighs you got from cheerleading and dancing are as juicy as I remember them.” I lower my voice and my gaze to find her breasts. “And those.” Goose bumps erupt on her flesh and I take that as a good sign that I can still affect her with just a look and my voice. “Your perky tits.” I groan, thinking about what they used to feel like in my mouth and how they’d pebble under my gaze. “I used to think that your tits had the power to make me do anything.” I chuckle. “All you’d have to do is pull your top off and I’d be on my knees in front of you.”
“I never had that much power over you,” she interrupts and I frown at her.
Is she serious? When we were together, all she had to do was look at me and I’d do anything for her.“What world are you living in? Yes, you did.”
“Clearly not. Because you left. After I begged. Pleaded. Cried. Begged more. Don’t tell me that all I would have had to do that night is pull my top off and you would have stayed because I will get up from this table right now.” Her words are hard but I see the pain in her eyes and the tears she’s trying to keep at bay. I ball my hands into a fist again to keep from touching her.
“Baby.”
Her eyes harden and she turns away from me. “No.” In that moment, our drinks arrive and I barely pay our waitress a glance as I grunt out athank you. When she leaves, I speak again.
“Whitney.” She looks at me as if to say,okay what?“I made a mistake.” She looks down at her drink and takes a tentative sip, followed by a large sip of water as if to counteract the alcohol she’s putting in her system so she can maintain some semblance of control. “I love you.” Her eyes widen and I shrug, laying all my cards out on the table once in for all. “I’ve always loved you. I’ve never stopped loving you. Don’t marry him.” Her lip wobbles and I know she’s seconds from losing it. “Can I take you somewhere more private? We can go to my house—”
“There you are!” The voice of Chloe stops me and unfortunately penetrates the haze that Whitney and I are in because I think Whitney was going to agree to coming back to my place.Fuck, Trey seriously?I give him a look and he winces and gives me a look as if to saywhat the fuck did you want me to do?
Chloe slides in next to Whitney forcing her slightly closer to me which I’d love if not for the fact that Chloe is in fact here. Trey slides in on the other side closer to me. “What are we talking about, what are we doing?” Chloe bounces in the seat, her blonde curls bouncing with her. She snaps her fingers between the two of us and I laugh at how drunk she clearly is. “Where do we get drinks? Do we have a waiter or do we go to the bar?”
“Baby, I think you’ve had enough,” Trey says and Whitney and my eyes both snap to his.
“Baby!?” Whitney shrieks. “Let me at him,” she says, trying to push Chloe out of the booth so she could get to my younger brother.
