Page 62 of What Was Meant To Be

He nods.

“Are you joking?”

“Does it look like I’m joking?”

“Wow.” I slide the Cartier watch off my wrist that he’d bought me for my birthday and put it on the coffee table along with my engagement ring. “I’ll leave you this and any of the jewelry, but my MacBook was a Christmas present and I’m in law school. If you think I’m leaving you a year and half’s worth of papers and research and homework, including a paper that’s half written that’s due at the end of the semester, you’re crazy.”

I walk up the stairs, preparing to pack some of my clothes as it seems he might trash all of my things the second I leave. I hadn’t expected this level of petty but I suppose it might just be a knee-jerk reaction to the pain. I toss a suitcase on the floor and begin throwing clothes into it. I pick up my phone just as it begins to ring again and I silence the call. I notice I have three missed calls and a text message from Jacob.

Jacob: Baby, you’re worrying me. You said you’d call me in ten minutes and now you’re not answering. Talk to me.

Me: I got home and Parker was here. I told him. Not about you specifically, just that it’s over. Now, I’m packing.

I give him the bullet points so that he’s not left completely in the dark but I hope he’s not going to ask me to go into more details while I just want to get out of here as soon as possible.

Jacob: Are you serious? Whitney, are you okay?

Me: Yes. Just let me pack some of my stuff.

Jacob: Call me when you get in the car.

I thumbs up the comment and continue packing in a haste because I wasn’t sure what would happen the longer that Parker stewed in his anger. I turn toward the door when I see a figure there and I see Parker on his crutches staring at me angrily.

“You’re really doing this?”

My shoulders slump and I hate how this looks. Like I’m just leaving him on a whim.

“After everything we’ve been through together? Why the fuck did you even agree to marry me?”

I tuck a hair behind my ear and twist the end of it around my finger nervously. “I… I don’t know.” I bite my lip preparing to tell him a little bit about my past but also not wanting to give him the full scope of the truth because truthfully my parents did need to hear that part first. “I fell in love a long time ago. Things didn’t work out and…”

“You weren’t over him when you met me.”

I lower my head to avoid his judgmental gaze and shake it gently. “No. I had spent almost a year trying to get over him and then you came along and you were kind and funny and smart and different.” I look up at him. “I’m sorry. I pushed him out of my head. Please don’t think I’ve been waiting around for him. I thought I’d moved on. I told myself I had moved on.”

“This is fucked up, Whitney.” He shakes his head and I can’t deny it. This whole situation is fucked up and I caused it. He takes a step back out of the room and shakes his head. “Take whatever, Whitney. I just hope you remember what goes around comes around.”

Jacob is waiting in his driveway when I get there and the car is barely in park before I’m in his arms and he presses his lips to mine. “You, okay?” he murmurs in my ear and I nod. I relayed everything to Jacob while I was on my way over and I could sense his uneasiness about how well Parker seemed to take it. “You’re sure?” I can hear the question in his voice if I thought Parker may retaliate in another way and I shake my head as he guides me into his house, leaving all of my things in my car. “You’re not speaking, use your words Whitney,” Jacob commands and I look up at him with watery eyes.

“He looked so hurt.” I sniffle, hating that I broke someone’s heart. I remember all too clearly what it felt like to have mine broken and I can’t believe I was capable of doing that to another person. He guides me up the stairs and pulls me into his bedroom where I can see the lights off in his ensuite bathroom but I can tell that there are candles lit.

“I ran you a bath and I poured you a glass of wine. Go.” He points to the open door. “I’m going to get your things from the car.”

I stare into the bathroom. I think I’m going into shock, the weight of what I’ve done coming crashing down around me. He follows me into the bathroom and I can see that he’d lit several candles that were lining the bubble filled bathtub and the tub was large enough that he could set a glass of wine on the side of the tub without fear of it being knocked over. Lavender fills my nose and I immediately feel myself relaxing under the scent.

“Will you join me?” If I were stronger, I’d ask for space. Space while I mourn a relationship before jumping into another one. But I wasn’t stronger and this was the man I’d loved since I was fifteen,fourteenif we are counting the crush I had.

“As much as I would love that, I think maybe you need some time to yourself.” He drops his forehead to mine and I relish in the minor contact. “If I get in this tub with you, you’re going to wrap your naked, wet body around me and then I’m going to fuck you and taste you, and I don’t want you to use that as an escape right now.”

“What if I need an escape?” I pull off my sweater and slide my jeans down my legs leaving me in only my lacy bra and thong and he glides his eyes down my body letting them hover between my legs. He bites his lip, stifling a groan. “Let me get your stuff and then we can talk about it. I’m open to negotiations.” He smiles and I know I’ve got him.

“Sure.” I shrug as I unclasp my bra, letting my breasts spring free and his eyes zero in on the nipples which also happen to be pebbling under his gaze. I turn my back to him just as I bend over to remove my thong and I hear a ‘fuck me’ whispered behind me. When I turn around to meet his eyes, he’s backing out of the room like he’s scared to make any sudden movements. I chuckle as I slide into the warm temperatures letting them soak my tense muscles.

I was anxious about what tomorrow would hold, wondering how my parents would take the news and all the questions they’d inevitably have. They may not be necessarily heartbroken over learning the news as they weren’t his biggest fans but I can already hear the Michelle Monroe inquisition now. I rub my forehead and take a large sip of the red wine and I shoot Jacob a text to bring the bottle up when he comes because I’m already halfway through the glass.

I close my eyes and allow myself to think about months from now where everything’s out in the open.

No more lies.

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