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I’m nervous as hell as I wait for Emilia to get here. It took so much effort to convince her to come over for tutoring. I can’t blow this now. I glance down at my outfit and brush my hands over my t-shirt. I purposely wore a tight black t-shirt with my old dark jeans. It’s a combo Emilia loves on me.
I’m already by the door when the doorbell finally rings. I and rest my head against the frame for a second in an attempt to not look overly eager. When I open the door, my heart skips a beat or three. She looks so stunning. Emilia is wearing a tight dress that showcases her body perfectly.
I drag my eyes away and step aside to let her in. “Hey,” I murmur nervously.
She beams up at me and grins. “Hey,” she says. She’s subtle, but I see her check me out the way I just checked her out. She walks to the coffee table and drops on the sofa. She crosses her legs and takes out her books.
“I… uh… I’ll make you a cup of coffee,” I murmur.
She frowns and shakes her head. “I’m good, thank you.”
I gulp and turn to walk to the kitchen. “I’ll make you one, anyway.”
I can feel her eyes on me all the way to the kitchen and drop my head against the refrigerator door. I’m being way too awkward. I inhale deeply and make her a cup of coffee. My hands are trembling as I put it down in front of her.
She looks up at me and smiles. “How have you been?” she asks. She seems so unaffected that I’m already second guessing myself. It’s been two weeks since she ended things, but she seems to be happier than she was before. She said she loved me, but it looks like she’s already over me.
I sit down next to her and inhale deeply. “I missed you, Minx. I’ve been fucking miserable.”
Her smile wavers, and for a second I see hope in her eyes. That’s all I need. All I need is a small sign.
Emilia looks down and takes a big gulp of her coffee, as though she’s trying to ignore what I said. I glance at her cup and look away. “Did you miss me?” I ask her, unable to resist. Emilia sighs and frowns at me.
“I thought you said we should try our best to remain friends. That us becoming estranged all over again would defeat the point.”
I sigh and run a hand through my hair. “I thought you said you loved me?”
She glares at me and then looks away. “I told you to forget about that.”
“I can’t. It’s all I’ve been able to think about.”
Emilia takes another sip of her coffee and puts it back down with force, a small amount of coffee still in it.
“What do you want me to say, Carter?” she snaps. God, I didn’t think this would be that hard. Why can’t I just get it right?
Emilia grabs her book and puts it back in her bag. “I can’t be around you,” she tells me, her voice breaking. “What was I even thinking? It’s too soon, Carter. It’s literally been two weeks. I can’t sit here and pretend we’re fine. Let’s not do this, okay?”
She grabs her bag and throws it over her shoulder. I panic and grab her arm, pulling her back. She looks back at me, her expression anguished.
“Emilia, wait,” I whisper. I’m panicked and nervous as hell. Without thinking, I grab her cup and empty it on the floor before thrusting it back into her hands. She glances at the mess on the floor and then at the cup, bewildered.
“Look inside it,” I tell her. “I had this whole plan. I even made a Pinterest account to help me think of ways to ask you. I wanted to do something cute, but I fucked it all up.”
Emilia blinks at me in confusion and then looks inside the cup. Her hand trembles as she looks back at me. I drop down on one knee and repeat the same words I had etched inside the cup.
“I love you, Emilia. Be my girlfriend?”
She just blinks at me instead of answering, and I panic even further. “I… when you told me how you felt, I panicked, baby. I was reminded of three years ago, when I was head over heels with you and everything just fell apart. I was devastated, but that was nothing compared to me finding you kissing someone else just a few months later. I just… I was scared the same thing would happen. That you love me now, and in three months you might change your mind. When it was just sex, I felt like I was in control. It was easier for me to tell myself I wouldn’t get hurt again. Needless to say, that was straight up stupid. I was worried that you’d break my heart, and it wouldn’t just be me that’d be hurt by that, you know? I was so worried that my selfishness would end up hurting my family. It was actually Asher… he made me realize my worries aren’t warranted, because they all relate to us breaking up. And hell, I don’t think we ever will.”
Emilia drops to her knees too and pushes her finger against my lips. “You’re rambling, babe,” she whispers, her eyes twinkling. “Yes. Hell yes.”
I drop my forehead to hers and smile. “Yes?” I repeat.
“Yes,” she says. Emilia throws her arms around my neck and I pull her flush against me, hugging her as tightly as I can.
“Fuck, those two weeks without you were the worst. Never again, baby. I’m never letting you go again.”
Emilia smiles up at me and shakes her head. “I’m never going to give you a chance to.”
