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“Oh, I heard you. I’ve heard it multiple times, but I don’t believe it.” With two fingers, she points at her eyes then mine. “I’m watching you, girl.”
I shake my head, hoping she realizes how ridiculous she sounds. “As you should be. You’re my Guardian.” There’s a nip of sarcasm to my tone that she picks up on right away.
“I’m not talking as a Guardian. I’m talking as your friend.”
Jagger and Crew return with drinks, giving one to Riley and the other to me. “Thank you,” I say to them. The first sip is heaven. “Mmm. This is good.” I lick the excess liquid of the fruity beverage from my lips. “What is it?”
“Strawberry lemonade with, I think, vodka.”
I nod, liking the sound of that, and take another drink. This time, a big one. It goes down so smooth and I can hardly taste the liquor, which makes it that much more quenching.
Riley sips on her drink leisurely, and after a few minutes have passed, mine’s gone and hers is still full.
“Be right back,” I say to her and the guys, who are standing around observing as if they’re waiting for something to happen. “I need a refill.”
“I’ll go with you,” Jagger says, resting his hand on my lower back. “You really shouldn’t be alone.”
I chuckle. “I’ll be fine. There are a hundred other people here.”
“Exactly my point. A hundred people and we can’t trust a single one of them.”
My eyes land on his. “I trust you.”
He tips a smile and curls his arm around my shoulder, so I lean into him. Jagger has a way of making all the bad things disappear. Being with him feels like home. It’s comfortable and it’s safe and it’s exactly where I want to be.
“I’m glad we got to that point. Ya know? Where you can trust me.”
I return his smile, feeling it in my soul. “Me, too.”
The farther we step into the crowd, the louder it gets, so I’m unable to say everything on my mind. If he could hear me, though, I’d say:I’m not sure there was ever a time I didn’t trust you. I know hurting me was never your goal, even if it was Neo’s. And that no amount of heat from the outside world, or anyone, for that matter, will ever make me choose because you and Crew are the best things in my life.
I’m actually glad I don’t have the opportunity to say all that because it sounds cheesy as hell. I’m not sure what happened to me, but these guys have brought out emotions inside me I didn’t know I was capable of feeling.
“Aww, isn’t this cute.” Neo bumps my side, causing me to knock Jagger into a group of girls, which sends liquid sloshing from their cups.
They all apologize in unison, as if they’re the ones who did something wrong.
“As you should be. Don’t let it happen again,” Jagger barks at them, before looking at me with a smile that drops quickly when he glances at Neo. “Thanks a lot, asshole.”
“For what? Getting you the attention of some other chicks? If Scar can sleep with other people, why can’t you?”
“Fuck off,” I grumble at him. Once again, wondering how there are times I see this jerk in a different light. The effects of my quick consumption of alcohol are starting to kick in and it hits me that Jagger didn’t give him a similar response. I squeeze his hip that I’m holding, grabbing his attention as we approach the beverage table. He looks down at me and I ask, “Do you wanna sleep with other girls?” As soon as the words leave my mouth, I realize how ridiculous they sound, but it’s something we’ve never talked about. Mainly because I’ve never thought about it, but has he? I’m sleeping with Crew, too—does he have any desires of sleeping with other girls? Is what we have exclusive?
“Hell no,” he responds almost immediately, glaring at Neo. “Quit putting shit in her head.”
But it is in my head, and suddenly, I feel the need to talk it out with both him and Crew. What are we doing? Where are these relationships going?
“I’m just saying, man. It hardly seems fair that you have to share but she doesn't.”
It is unfair, isn’t it?
Jagger maneuvers us through the group gathered around the table and grabs me another fruity drink and a beer for himself while I hang back with Neo. Normally I’d have a lot to say, but right now, my thoughts are taking over. I’ve never cared what anyone else thought of me, but I do care about Jagger and Crew. Do they feel like they’re both being played by me? Because that’s not what this is at all. I genuinely care about each of them, more than I can ever put into words, unless it’s three. I love them. I really do. The thought of losing either of them is something I can’t fathom. But how long can we go on like this? In the end, will all three of us lose?
“You’re thinking about it, aren't you?” Neo says, his words like nails on a chalkboard.
I scowl, eyes on Jagger, so I don’t lose him in the madness. “Yeah, thanks to you.”
“Come on, Scar. You can’t really think you’ll be the last pussy my boys tap for the rest of their lives. Whatever you three have going on, it’s temporary. A few months and we’ll be headed to BCU, where you’ll all eventually lose interest in this little fling you’ve got going on.”
