AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Tears well in my eyes. Words frozen in my throat, I press my quivering lips tighter together, afraid to speak. Wary, I’ll say the wrong words.
“He slumped back onto the sofa. I was never a good aim. I went for his shoulder and hit him in the heart. Mom came over. She was so calm. She told me everything was going to be alright. I lost all feeling in my arms. They fell in front of me. She took the gun from my hands and told me to go to bed. That’s when it all left me. I did as I was told when I heard the next gunshot. I turned around and saw her with the gun. I forgot it all. Forgot everything that happened. All I ever remembered from that night was hearing that single gunshot, turning around, and finding Mom with the gun in her hand and Dad on the sofa.”
“Lix,” I breathe his name from my trembling lips.
“It was me.” He punches his chest. “I fucking shot him,” he yells, hitting his chest harder with each word. “How could I have forgotten that? All these years, I thought she killed him! It was me!”
I lay my palm on his chest, trying to protect it from another punch from his frustrated fist. “Sometimes, when children experience a traumatic event, they block it out to protect themselves. It happens. It’s not your fault.”
“Not my fault?” His eyes grow wild. “I killed my father, and Mom’s been serving nearly twenty years for it! Why didn’t she say anything? Why the fuck would she take the blame. Go to jail for me!”
“Maybe she was protecting you.”
“I was eight! It’s not like they could charge me. It makes no sense!”
“You’ll have to ask her.”
“Oh, I fucking plan to!”
Chapter 29
I slept like shit last night.
The bell rings, announcing it’s time to find out the truth. I clench my hands together on the table. Knuckles white and neck strained. I watch the prisoners unfold into the room.
Mom’s eyes find mine, the display of confusion remains on her face as she lowers into the plastic chair across from me.
“I thought it was Cole’s weekend.” Her eyes fly open. “Is he okay? Did something—”
“No. He’s fine, Mom,” I calmly reply, containing my fury and the fucked-up nightmare that’s kept me awake the past few nights.
“Oh, thank God.” Her hand slides from her chest.
“What? You’re not happy to see me instead,” I attempt a smile, knowing by her reaction it’s not following through to the rest of my face.
“I’m always happy to see my youngest son,” she says as a twinkle returns to her blue eyes momentarily. Her smile fades. “Are you okay, Felix?”
Not cowering, I hold direct eye contact. “Something happened the other night.”
“What?” She searches my face. “Was it while you were doing one of those escorts? Did you get hurt? One of your brothers. I knew something like this was going to—”
“No.” I hold up a hand, halting her mind from running astray. “We are all fine, promise.”
“Thank heaven.” Hand back on her chest, she releases her breath. “Then what happened?”
“I remembered something,” I pause, trying to retain the strength to continue. “About the night Dad died.”
“Oh, honey. You were so little. It’s best if you just let all that go.” She waves her hand in the air, eyes roaming the room. “We don’t need to—”
“Mom.” I cut her off. “I know what happened.”
Her juddering eyes dock back on me. “Felix, we all know what happened that night.” She lowers her hands to the table, serenely clasping them together. “That’s why…” She leans in toward me. “It’s best to leave it in the past.” She smiles, scanning the room to cast the conversation aside.
“Mom,” I say in a stern tone, never to be echoed in my mother’s ears. One that prompts her scattered view right back to me. I lean in closer to her this time. “I know the truth, Mom.” I hold her crumbling gaze. “It was me. I killed him.”
“Don’t say that!” She waves her hands.
“Mom—”
