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Whether the emotion is valid or not, Dani made me feel something for her. Something deep and unshakeable. It infuriates me to know that while I was falling for her, she was just using me. Enjoying the thrill of her momentary rebellion.
And though I’ve tried to forget Dani, I can’t seem to get over her. I’ve seen her around town a few times because, even though my mind is made up, I can’t seem to stop crossing paths with her, finding excuses to be in the locations I know her schedule takes her.
At least, I’ve managed enough self-discipline to avoid interacting with her.
My fridge beeps at me, reminding me that I’ve left the door open too long. Growling in frustration, I slam it closed.
I’m going back to the gym.
Physical exertion seems to be the only thing that helps keep my anger at bay—even if only for a moment. Dressed in a plain tee and some joggers, I snatch up my gym bag and slip into my running shoes, then head for my front door.
Yanking it open, I stop short, my stomach dropping as I stare down at the petite blonde in my doorway.
Dani’s blue eyes open wide as her raised fist hovers in the air as if ready to knock. “Efrem,” she gasps, her cheeks flushing. “Did I catch you at a bad time?” Her eyes dip to the bag slung over my shoulder before moving back to my face.
“What are you doing here, Dani?” I ask, my question coming out unintentionally coarse in my surprise.
“Can we… talk?” she asks tentatively, trapping her lower lip between her teeth.
I know I’m supposed to be quitting her, but she’s the one who came to me, so I’ll at least hear her out. Glancing up and down the hallway, I step back to let her in. She does so hesitantly and turns to face me as I close the door behind her. Dropping my duffle bag, I cross my arms as I war with my tumult of emotions.
Dani’s fingers tug at the hem of her flowing purple shirt, twisting it nervously as she remains silent. Her eyes dart around my apartment, taking in the simple modern decor.
“Would you like to sit?” I ask when it’s clear she’s not going to jump right into whatever it is she wants to say. And though I’m painfully curious about what it is, I refuse to open the discussion.
“Thanks,” Dani breathes, her shoulders dropping in relief. Whatever brought her here clearly has her wound tight.
I gesture her toward my living room, and she settles onto my gray cloth couch, scooting over and angling her hips as if to indicate I should sit beside her.
Genuinely intrigued, I do. “How do you know where I live?” I ask when the question needles me in the following silence.
“I, um, may have asked Val for it…” she admits, her cheeks flushing a deep rose. “He told me it was your day off.”
Taking a deep breath, Dani lets it out slowly, as if fortifying herself for whatever she has to say. And though my impatience is gnawing at me, I force myself to wait. To let her take it at her own pace.
“Efrem, I—” Her voice cracks, and her gaze drops as she swallows hard. And when she looks up again, tears shimmer in her eyes. “I came to apologize.”
Whatever I expected her to say, that was not it.
And the raw vulnerability in her voice tugs at my heart.
But my back stays stiff as I maintain my distance, waiting for the rest.
Shaking her head, Dani wipes impatiently at a tear as it falls down her cheek. “I never should have burdened you with my family issues. It was unfair of me to expect you to live a lie or hide our relationship—least of all for the sake of my father’s career.”
She scoots forward, closing the distance between us as her deep blue eyes implore me to understand. And it’s hard to remain passive when my body wants nothing more than to pull her into my arms.
“I’ve let society’s judgment hamstring me and tie me in knots for longer than I can remember,” Dani continues. “And one of the things I love about you is how free you make me feel, from judgment, from expectation.”
Just hearing the word “love” from Dani’s lips makes my stomach knot. But it’s not like she said she loves me. Still, warmth spreads through my limbs to know she loves things about me.
Dani starts to reach for my hand, then seems to think better of it, and my heart sinks as she folds her hands in her lap.
But her eyes hold a longing that makes my body hum. “You let me be me without expecting me to fit into some box that suits your vision. And when it was my turn to reciprocate, I failed completely. I fell into the same trap as my parents, mirroring their behavior even though it drives me absolutely crazy.”
She rolls her eyes, and despite myself, a small smile tugs at the corners of my lips.
“The last thing I want to do is make you feel like I’m using you, Efrem. Like I’m only in it for the sex—although, I doreallylike that part of our relationship.”
