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Sighing, Efrem sits up, his brows furrowing.
Silence stretches between us as he seems to gather his thoughts, and it intensifies my anxiety. Because it must not be a small thing if it’s hard for him to tell me. Finally, he looks up to meet my eyes, and the doubt in them both shocks and disturbs me.
“I feel I have made a mistake,” he confesses, making my blood run cold as my mind automatically jumps to the worst possible conclusion.
That he made a mistake about me.
“When I’m with you, I can’t help but let down my guard. You are… bewitching, Dani. And I feel as though the world vanishes around me when you are near.”
The words sound dangerously close to a confession of love. And they make my heart flutter. They could easily be romantic if he weren’t confessing them like a sinner on his way to condemnation.
“But I am losing sight of what is important because all I can think about is having you for myself,” he says, his rich, accented voice apologetic.
“What does that even mean?” I ask, feeling the world closing in on me once again, and my breaths are suddenly painful.
“I failed Pyotr and could have let his family come to harm because of my carelessness yesterday. I was supposed to be available if they needed me, but I was here, with you, so lost in my own selfish desire that I didn’t answer the call.”
Icy adrenaline flushes through my veins as I pull back, feeling the blame fall squarely on my shoulders. But Efrem’s not done.
“And now I am the reason you are at odds with your family. I do not like it.”
The agony on his face cuts like a knife, and in an instant, I’m furious. Because just days ago, he was pissed at me for not treating this like a real relationship, for trying to keep him a secret. And now that I’ve put myself out there for him, shown the world what he means to me, he’s backing out.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” I snap.
“Dani—”
Efrem reaches for me, but I jerk away from his touch, scrambling off the bed in an instant.
“No, seriously. I just gave up my family because you didn’t like being treated like a secret. I get that. I understand why you would want me to commit or choose not to. But I told you how serious my family is about our image. I told you they wouldn’t understand, and now that I’m facing the consequences, you want to feel bad?”
The guilt warring across Efrem’s features drives the nail home.
“I just want to make it right,” he says, his gaze agonized. “This is my fault. I shouldn’t have—”
“You know what? No, I don’t want to do this right now,” I state, the knot in my throat choking me and bringing tears to my eyes.
Because I’m beyond frustrated that he would think things are wrong when I finally felt like they were right. My time with him since the art gallery has given me some of the best moments of my life. I love being with Efrem. He gives my life meaning and makes the world feel right.
So hearing him say that he wants to fix this feels like an intense betrayal.
Not to mention I’m scared half out of my mind that he’s about to talk himself into breaking up with me.
Beyond that, I’m deeply hurt that he thinks I’m why he missed Pyotr’s call. It was an honest mistake—one he made—and I hardly think it’s fair to add that guilt to our relationship.
In an instant, the happiness I’d built inside my head comes crumbling down around me as I crash back to reality. He doesn’t want the responsibility of my decision any more than I wanted to make it in the first place.And now, what am I supposed to do?
Go crawling back to my parents because Efrem can’t make up his mind?
I don’t think so.
Storming to the living room, I snatch up my clothes and start to dress.
“Dani, stop,” Efrem says as he follows me, stooping to don his boxers as he braces for an argument.
“I can’t do this right now,” I state, fighting to hold back my tears.
“Please, let me try to explain,” he says gently.
