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Morgana is the first to stand, and when she does, she finally looks around. “Is this…” she trails off, like she’s not quite sure what she wants to ask.
“It’s where we train,” Gus says.
“In a maze,” Lupa says, one side of her mouth lifted in a half-smile. “That’s… fitting.” The way she says it has me wondering if she wanted to say something else, especially with the way she keeps looking around and mumbling to herself.
The more we talk, the less guilty I feel. I understand that each family has its own traditions, and it’s something I would never dare to mess with. If we were all the same, we’d be expendable, and we’d probably be even more stumped in our growth. It feels right to share it with them, though. To let them see where Gus and I come from, and what we’ve had to endure—even if it’s only the tip of the iceberg. Unless you’ve been in the maze, it’s hard to fully appreciate just how harrowing the experience is.
“So if I’m understanding this correctly,” Morgana says, her tone hard and unyielding as she turns her eyes on Kai. “You want us here so you can marry the dragon. On top of that, you also want our silence both about the marriage and the death of the Leaders.”
Kai bristles and looks at me with a ‘what the hell did you do’ look, and I’m so surprised I can’t even blame him.
“Morgana!” I chide, but she ignores me.
“Those are awfully big favors, don’t you think?”
Sighing, Kai gives her a barely there nod. “I suppose so. So what do you want in return?”
The Hatt beams at him and takes Lupa’s hand. “This, Kairos. All I want is the Ruler’s permission to be myself, in every sense of the word. I shouldn’t have to hide who I love.”
My husband-to-be looks genuinely confused as he says, “I can’t force your families to accept your relationship. It’s tradition for cross-family relations to be blessed by both, so you’ll have to take it up with your Leader.” My heart fills with joy at his words.
I hate admitting how much I’ve been worrying that Kai would share his Society’s archaic view on same-sex coupling, but now it’s abundantly clear that he couldn’t care less.
Deciding that he needs a little help to understand what Morgana is really asking for, I nudge him and say, “She isn’t worried about the cross-family stuff. It’s because of what happened to Lupa…” I trail off, wanting him to work the rest out for himself.
It’s almost comical to watch as he finally gets it, and judging by the amused snorts from Gus and Liam, they’ve enjoyed it as well.
“You have my word, Morgana,” Kai states, very seriously. “I do not agree with this particular rule, and it is one I want to abolish as soon as I have a new council established.”
Lupa opens and closes her mouth, imitating a fish out of water.
Morgana holds out her hand and demands, “Swear it, Ruler.”
Kai takes her hand and swears that he will do whatever he can to outlaw the hate crimes and even goes as far as to invite both Morgana and Lupa to help. “Regardless of who becomes the new Leader of your individual families we could always use some help. Acacia trusts the two of you, so I have to learn to do the same. If you have any other inputs, please don’t hold back.” He smiles wryly at the Hatt Protégé and adds, “No need to extort me, Morgana. I inherited the Society from my dad, that doesn’t mean I agree or even like all the rules.”
While Lupa whoops with delight, Morgana acts like it’s nothing, playing it cool as she takes her girlfriend’s hand and squeezes it. Then she simply nods and studies her cuticles, appearing like an ungrateful brat. At least on the surface, but I’m not fooled. The shake to her hands and the tears brimming in her eyes are as subtle as they’re telling.
When I notice that we’re all watching the Hatt Protégé, I feel bad. “I agree that changes are needed,” I say. “And I think it would be helpful to get feedback from others, rather than just the three Leaders.”
Kai pulls me to his side and murmurs, “Once we’re officially married, you can make all the changes you want,” I gulp, surprised.
I mean, I knew that as the female Ruler I’d be his equal, but I guess I never thought of what that would really mean.
“Is that where you had to live?” Morgana asks, disdain coating every word.
I follow her gaze that’s firmly on the hovel in the distance. “Yeah, it is,” I answer, my tone warm as I allow myself to recall some of the best times in my life, which were all right here. “It’s not much, but this is home for me. It’s where I was reborn, my skills were forged in a dragon’s fire and the blood I shed in the maze was the toll, and I paid it willingly.”
I’m not stupid, I know I see it differently than Gus, and he’s probably right to see it how he does. I’d never try to change his mind. What he endured is his story, his truth, and it was very different to mine. While our day-to-day life here was the same, it filled a unique part in our very being.
I let it mold me, reshape me until I became something unrecognizable, and I embraced it. For him, it was a chore, a hardship he was forced through. Though I’m beginning to think it might have been something else as well. Where it gave me a purpose and made me proud of my roots, I think it did the opposite to him. I’m afraid it gave him the sense of not belonging, of not being enough.
As that thought enters my mind, I absorb it and let it take root while I only half pay attention to Kai, Lupa, and Morgana talking. My primary focus is on Gus. He has hurt me like no one else has, cut me deeper than any weapon could. Have I unknowingly done the same to him? Though I’m not trying to excuse his behavior—and Iwillmake us even, eventually—I can’t deny that I could have handled things better.
I let my guilty conscience rule me, dictate the order I divulged things in, and I know that was a mistake. Like when I told Liam, I started with facts rather than assuring them of my devotion and love. It’s not completely my fault, though. These men—my men—as big, strong, and deadly as they are… they’re even more damaged underneath the surface. Something they only allow me to see, and I failed them. That doesn’t mean they get free rein to treat me like dirt, it just means I have an equal responsibility, one I’ve somewhat shirked and forgotten about.
“Holyshit,”Imurmuras my eyes land on Cia while she gracefully walks towards me. She’s flanked by Gus and Liam, her hands are on their arms as they walk closer to where I’m standing—the entrance of the legendary Drákon maze.
Lupa and Morgana are both behind me, each of them holding a single flower—the flower of the Acropolis, also called Micromeria acropolitana.
