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Instead of losing it, I feel like I’ve looked into Medusa’s eyes and turned to stone. My breaths are shallow, and I’m just… sitting there while my dad shatters my world—again.
Even though tears gather in my eyes, I don’t allow them to fall. I get up from the chair and gather the few belongings I brought with me. When I reach the door, I turn around and say, “I guess karma catches up to all of us, eventually.” My voice is as hollow as I feel, but I don’t know what words to use to articulate what I really want to say.
Short of throwing myself at his feet and begging him not to leave me, there’s nothing I can do.
He mumbles something that sounds like agreement and regret.
“I only have one thing to say to you. Don’t abandonherlike you did me. Tell her before it’s too late, and let her choose what she wants to do.” I know I don’t have to tell him who I’m referring to. There’s really only one otherherit could be.
His voice is gravelly as he says, “I won’t. I don’t repeat the same mistake twice. You should remember that.” Before the door closes behind me, he adds, “I know now it was never my place to fix what’s broken. It’s you, you’re the one who needs to do it. My job was only to pave the way for you. I know that now.”
“Liam!”Myhandonhis arm has absolutely no effect, and he just shrugs it off while heading towards the door. “William Drákon. Stop trying to get away from me, or I swear I’ll jump on your back and hold on until you force me away from you.” It’s not an empty threat, and the way he deflates is enough for me to know he’s aware of that as well.
“What do you want, mistress?” There’s no kindness or love in the way he uses that title, in fact, it’s almost a fucking mockery, and that irks me.
I don’t have to look around to know we’ve garnered the attention of the students nearby. This is why we can’t talk freely at Kronos University. You never know who could be hidden around the corner. “Not here,” I say, the finality in my voice clear. With a sigh, I soften my voice and suggest we get the hell out of here.
As I drive us to the beach I love so much, I try to sort through my thoughts. I know I royally fucked up some weeks ago when I, in righteous anger, declared I’d choose and then tucked tail and left. It wasn’t my finest moment, and I knew that as soon as I’d let the words slip. I can’t take them back, though, so all I can do is try to make amends.
The apology I owe is long overdue, and it’s honestly shitty of me that I haven’t said anything yet. Since Gus and Kai haven’t seemed bothered, I’ve let that lull me into a state where I’ve just gotten on with my life instead of doing the right thing. Hell, I’ve willfully ignored Liam’s moping and curt behavior—all of which is evidence of how much I hurt him.
After parking, I take his hand and drag him towards my usual spot, not caring about the wind. The mild weather and scorching degrees of summer are gone, and the leaves on the trees are once again turning yellow.
Halloween is right around the corner, and for the life of me, I can’t figure out how time has moved this fast. I know it’s due to all the obligations we’ve had to fulfill, and the planning of my wedding to Kai. Even though the wedding isn’t until after we graduate from Kronos University, there are still a lot of things to do.
Seriously, where has the time gone? It’s hard to believe that Gus and I have been back for almost a year and a half by now, and that we only have nine months left at Kronos University. I know normal universities are four years, just as I know there’s nothing normal about my world. After all, what’s the point of wasting that long on an education none of usreallyneed? And we definitely shouldn’t really care about it.
Yet another archaic tradition and belief.
“How is the wedding planning going?” Liam asks like he can read my thoughts.
I tug him down so we’re sitting in the soft sand, keeping our fingers intertwined. “Ugh, don’t ask,” I sigh, frowning. “It’s… well, it’s all coming together nicely, I suppose. It’s just way too grand and…” I swirl my free hand in front of me, trying to show that I’m over it.
This earns a smile from my consort. “Yeah, I can’t imagine you’re loving it all that much.” His lopsided smile is still in place, and that gives me hope he’ll listen to me rather than continue to pull away.
“Do you know how much I love you?” I ask, my eyes never straying from his. The indifferent shrug I get in answer is heartbreaking, and I sigh. “Liam, you’re mine for as long as you want to be. Nothing will ever change that. I know I said some shitty words, and I’m so sorry. Though I can’t take them back, I can try to assure you that I can’t—and won’t—choose. The three of you are mine, and that’s all there is to it.” I cringe as my words come out like a possessive claim rather than a declaration of my love and devotion.
When Liam says nothing back, I let my gaze wander to the gray ocean. I don’t know why I feel like I can think much clearer when I’m here, but I can. It’s almost as though there’s a haze keeping my thoughts blurry and imprecise when I’m away. Here, though… here I have complete clarity.
“I was angry and hurt, but that’s no excuse, it’s only a reason. The thing is, you have to be okay with Gus because if you aren’t… I don’t know what to do.”
Liam snorts and shakes his head. “I’ll never be okay with what he did to you,” he spits, disdainfully, letting me know exactly how much my cousin is still on his shit list.
“Yeah, I get that,” I say, absentmindedly running my fingers through my high ponytail. I was going to brush it off, however, I’m no longer so sure that’s the right thing to do. “Truthfully, I’m not completely okay with it either. It’s not like I’m scared of him or anything, but the trust isn’t completely back. I’ve just decided to move on, and that’s all I can do for now. The rest will have to come naturally or it won’t matter.”
It’s almost comical the way Liam snaps his head to the side so he can watch me as he gasps, “So you’re not over it either?”
I kiss the hand that’s still holding mine, before moving around so I can lie down with my head in Liam’s lap. “Of course not. Are you over what I did just because I said I’m sorry?” When Liam shakes his head with a sad expression, I hurry to assure my consort that I don’t hold that against him. “It’s the same with me and Gus. I’m willing to move past it, and I’m doing what I can. But hurt doesn’t evaporate or cease to exist just because we want it to, does it?”
Liam doesn’t need to speak to me, I can see the answer clearly on his face. He gets it, and even if he won’t admit it, it’s the same situation I’m in with him. Words alone aren’t going to fix what I broke, it’s going to take actions and, more importantly, time.
“When I left I met up with my dad,” I admit. It’s the first time I tell anyone where I went. “I asked him to meet me, and we had a rather productive talk.”
The soft caress of Liam’s fingers in my hair stops and he scoffs, “Productive?”
“Yeah, productive,” I repeat the word, like clarification is needed. I already know Liam wasn’t asking me to repeat it, rather for me to elaborate, so I do. “Our talk was long overdue, and I knew I couldn’t avoid it forever. I had planned to ask you to come with me, but then…” I gnaw on my bottom lip as I trail off.
I’m not exactly sure how to refer to that day, or what any of us did. A series of fuck-ups? Unfortunate events? Neither of those really covers it, but I’m at a loss for how else to phrase it.
