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“I haven’t wanted to push you to talk about it,” Aunt Hilary starts, “but the way you disappeared and stayed away when your mom died…I just thought it was your way of dealing with the grief. I tried to find you for a while and pushed your dad about it a few times, but that was a dead end.” She reaches out and puts her hand on top of mine. “He said he didn’t know where you were, but when he died and the lawyer contacted me, I asked how he’d found you. He acted surprised that I didn’t know where you were, said your dad had your address all along.”
I shiver and Abby hands me a sweatshirt of hers that was hanging over the back of the chair. I put it on and take a deep breath.
“He found me about a year after I left.” I nod.
The horror I felt when I got to my room after a long day of mucking stalls and found the letter from him waiting for me rushes back and I feel sick to my stomach. The letter had been brief, but it said more than enough to keep the fear alive.
I stand up and try to inject some enthusiasm into my voice. “I’m really excited about you moving here. You don’t have to decide about the house right away. But if there’s anything you’d like to keep, let me know; otherwise, I’m going to do the biggest spring cleaning this house has ever seen.”
They look at me like they’re not certain if I’m unhinged or not, and honestly, I’m not certain myself.
“I really only care about the pictures of your mom,” Aunt Hilary says. “I could scan them so you can keep the original copies.” She lifts a shoulder. “I don’t even keep my own shit for very long, so I don’t need to keep anything else.”
I nod again, feeling the need to move, the need to get out of this house.
“I’m just gonna go check on the horses.” I smile and head to the back door.
“Sofie,” Aunt Hilary calls.
I turn to look at her.
“Are you okay? You look pale.” She stands up and moves toward me.
“I’m fine.”
“I think we might leave in the morning,” Abby says. “We’ve actually already started packing and have some interest in our house. We got a call earlier this morning about an offer.”
“That’s great.” I sound fake and it’s the last thing I feel, but I need to get out of here. “Really, the sooner you get here, the better.”
I make my escape and close the door behind me, running toward the stables. I go into each horse’s stall, spending time brushing and tending to them, the anxiety draining the longer I’m out here.
How am I going to empty the house if I can’t even be in there for an hour without losing it?
The thought of tearing it down is more enticing all the time.
CHAPTERTWENTY-TWO
BE MY GUEST
THEO
The Doherty farm takes way more time than I expected. I’d thought it would take four or five hours at most to get through all the shots and checkups for Mr. Doherty’s herd, but the state of one of his cows concerns me as I’m getting ready to leave, so I spend extra time checking her out. Her moos are higher-pitched and she seems distressed, but Mr. Doherty says she’s normally his troublemaker.
I’ve almost written it off to it being her normal behavior when I check her temperature one more time and it’s slightly elevated.
“I think we should separate her just in case something more is going on,” I tell Mr. Doherty, and he puts her in another field that has more shade. “Everything else seems to be okay as far as I can tell. Hopefully it’s nothing.”
I stay a few hours longer, monitoring her, and she seems to calm considerably, which just leaves me perplexed.
“I’ll be back out to check on her tomorrow,” I tell Mr. Doherty. “Let me know if you need me before then.”
“Will do,” he says. “Thanks, Theo.”
I check my phone as I start driving home, disappointed that there’s nothing from Sofie. When I get home, Fred is in the backyard and comes flying through the dog door, nearly knocking me over.
“Hey, boy.” I pet him and set his food out before I throw my work clothes in the laundry and get in the shower.
Once I’m out and smelling much better than before, I pick up my phone again and see that I’ve missed a call…from Hilary.
