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Myshoulders stiffen, butIkeep my fingers moving over the strings.Shehasn’t asked to paint my portrait.
“Yeah.Ioffered to make it a nude, but she wasn’t interested.”
Iknow he’s kidding, but it lands firmly in the not funny basket.
“What’sgoing on with you two?”Beauasks.
Ialmost choke, quickly swallowing down the liquid in my mouth. “Whatdo you mean?”Iask, going for nonchalant.
“Idon’t know,” he says, “Youseem different around each other lately.Didyou have an argument?”
Iput my beer down, buying some time.Ishould just fucking tell him.ButI’mnot ready yet.AndShaeandIhaven’t talked about where this relationship is going.What’sthe point of starting somethingImight not have a reason to finish?
Igo with what he’s given me. “MaybeI’vebeen pushing her too hard about doing something with her painting.”
Beaulets out a chuckle, thankfully buying it. “Yeah, she’s fucking stubborn about it.”Thenhis expression grows somber.Hisbrow furrows and his eyes go dark. “IwishIcould punch the person who convinced her she wasn’t good enough,” he says, echoing my own sentiments.
“I’mgoing to keep trying to convince her to apply to school here.Idon’t want her disappearing back toAshford.”
Beauslides his gaze toward me. “Idon’t think either of us wants that.”
There’ssomething in his voiceIcan’t quite place that has my hand clenching around the neck of my guitar.
Weplay for another half an hour, mucking around with melodies.ThenBeaudecides to hit the gym for a quick weights session, andI’mstanding outsideShae’sbedroom door.Iknock, and when she calls for me to come in,Ipush the door open.
Shelooks up and smiles when she sees me.Thesoft expression makes my ribs squeeze tight.It’sthe same beautiful smile she gave me the first time we met, and it takes my breath away now like it did then.She’ssitting with her back against the headboard with her knees pulled up and a book resting on them.
“Whatare you reading?”Iask, making myself comfortable on the bed next to her.
Sheholds it up.Thecover has a half-naked man with tattoos running over his chest and down his arms.
Ichuckle. “Looksfamiliar.”
Sheflips the book over and looks at the picture, then lets out a quiet laugh. “Yeah,Iguess so.”
Afterplacing a bookmark between the pages, she puts it down next to her. “Where’sBeau?”
“Downin the gym for a quick workout.Which, unfortunately, meansIdon’t have time to do any of the thingsIwant to do to you.”
Sheputs her hand on my thigh and gives a faux pout. “Areyou sure?”
“I’mnot sure about anything when it comes to you.”
Aline forms between her brows, and she pulls her hand back.ButIgrab it and lace my fingers with hers. “Notin a bad way.Ina way whereInever expected to be here with you, but now thatIam,Ican’t imagine my life any different.”
Shelets out a sigh and squeezes my hand. “Thankyou.Ineeded to hear that.”
Iknow not tellingBeauis hard on her.ParticularlysinceIcan’t tell her the truth about whyI’mso reluctant.
“CanIask you something?”Iask.
Shelooks at me with arched brows and a half smile. “Ofcourse.”
Itrace a pattern over her knuckles with my thumb. “Whathappened withPhillip?Anddon’t tell me you just drifted apart.Iknow that’s not the truth.Notthe full truth anyway.”
Thesecond the words leave my mouth, tension rolls off her in waves.IfIwas a good friend,Iwould have pressed her on this before.ButI’vealready provenI’mnot a good friend.Andthe minuteIheard she’d broken up withPhillip,Ipulled back from her.Becausemaybe, even then,Iknew that if she didn’t have a serious boyfriend,I’dstruggle to resist her.
“Youdon’t really want to hear about it,” she says, her head dipped low and her attention fixed on her lap.
