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“Hey.” Charlotte gave me a reassuring smile as she rubbed my back. “You’ll be fine. Just breathe. You got this.”
“Thanks.”
Savannah gurgled and gnawed on the ear of the stuffed toy in her hand, oblivious to everything else.
After a deep, calming breath, I opened the door for Charlotte, then followed her inside to stand before a reception desk. An older woman finished typing something on her computer, then looked up at us over the rims of her glasses.
“May I help you?” she asked, her expression pure schoolmarm.
“Yes,” I said, then cleared my throat. “My name’s Gabe Kelley, and I have a custody hearing with Judge Mayhew at nine.”
The woman gave a curt nod, then gestured toward some empty chairs along the wall. “Please have a seat. I’ll let him know you’ve arrived.”
In here, it was hard to tell you weren’t in some normal office, with the beige walls and beige carpet and beige furniture. Beige forever. While the assistant phoned the judge and spoke in muted tones, I took a seat next to a Ficus and did my best to keep Savannah from tearing all its leaves off.
God. I hated these places. It was one of the reasons I’d joined the military, to avoid getting stuck behind a desk somewhere like this.
What felt like a small eternity passed, with me still trying to get my thundering heart under control, before the woman behind the desk led us into the judge’s office. I know I shouldn’t have been so nervous. I’d faced down military brass and unsavory characters a lot more threatening than the gray-haired man across the desk from me. But this was about my daughter, about her future. This was about the rest of my life. Our lives. Hopefully together.
“Mr. Kelley,” the judge said, standing to shake my hand. Charlotte took the folder from me so I could free up a hand. “Judge Mayhew. Nice to meet you. I remember your parents. Shame what happened.”
“Thanks,” I said, adjusting Savannah in my arms and ignoring the clench in my heart at the reminder of my past. I should be used to it by now, after being back here for several weeks, but it still got me every time.
“And Charlotte. Always great to see you,” the judge said, smiling at her.
It seemed everyone in Harpers Ferry knew who she was too. Then again, with the tavern, I guessed that made sense. And well, Charlotte had never left town like I did, so…
I passed the folder of paperwork across the desk to the judge, hoping the slight tremor in my hands didn’t show. Jesus. Me, always rock solid during any tense situation, losing my shit over a simple court hearing. Except this didn’t seem simple. Not at all. It felt like the biggest moment in my life.
Because yeah, I’d helped conceive Savannah, but the outcome of this hearing would determine whether I’d finally become her legal father.
“And this must be Savannah,” the judge said, grinning at my daughter, then reaching out to take her hand. “I’ve got grandkids about your age, sweetheart. What a good girl.”
“She is,” Charlotte and I said together, then gave each other some side-eye.
“Right,” Judge Mayhew said. We all took our seats, and then he opened the folder and frowned down at my paperwork. “Let’s get this started.”
While he read through everything, I looked around, trying to distract myself. The office was small, maybe ten by fifteen, with two of the walls lined with bookcases. Leatherbound books with gold lettering on the spines crowded together, mainly law-related from what I could tell. There were a few pictures of the judge and a woman I presumed was his wife. A few more with what were probably adult children and those grandkids he’d mentioned.
Charlotte reached over and put her hand on my knee to stop me from bouncing my heel on the floor. Damn. I did that when I was nervous. I hadn’t realized I was doing it now. For her part, she looked serene and cool. I felt hot and buzzing, like I’d swallowed a hive of bees.
“I see here that you’re an active-duty Navy SEAL, is that correct?” The judge looked up at me over his wire-rimmed glasses.
“Yes, sir.” I swallowed hard.
“Well, first off, thank you for your service.”
I gave a curt nod.
“And second, while as I understand it you weren’t in the picture until recently, I’m sorry for your loss of the child’s mother. Nasty business, that, and I hope the police wrap up the investigation soon to give you all some closure.”
“Thanks.” The word croaked out of my constricted throat.
He glanced down at the paperwork again, then gave me a concerned look. “I suppose the biggest question I need answered, Mr. Kelley, is how you plan to provide for your daughter while you’re away on missions. From what I see of your financial records here, it seems money won’t be an issue, but what about your daughter’s emotional and physical needs?”
I looked over at her again, and Charlotte nodded. “As you’ll see in the paperwork, sir, Charlotte has agreed to be Savannah’s legal guardian in my absence. The baby’s mother chose Charlotte to be her godmother, so it should be obvious that she’s an important part of my daughter’s life. She’ll take care of Savannah while I’m away on missions. The baby has already spent time in her home and is used to her, so I don’t think it will be a problem.”
“Hmm.” Judge Mayhew flipped through more pages. “And what happens if you don’t come back?”
