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“No. No, no, no. You hacked my Wi-Fi or something, right? Right, Rhys? Tell me you just hacked into my network, got my password. Anything.”
“It’s me.”
It can’t be. I stare at him while every ounce of my dignity shatters at my feet. My heart is hammering in my chest. This isn’t happening.
“The FaceTime thing?” I choke out.
“That was me.”
I can’t breathe. My mind replays every thing I ever said to him. Every flirtatious comment. Every sweet remark. He’s seen the most private parts of my life. He’s seenmy actualprivate parts.
I told him things I would never want Rhys to know. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. God, he’s probably been laughing at me this whole time. My chin wobbles. It’s one thing for him to see me naked, it’s another for him to get a glimpse at my inner thoughts. He doesn’t get that part of me. Those privileges belong to people who care about me, who treat me with respect. I told him things I never would have if I’d known it was him. I have never felt so humiliated.
“Why me, Rhys?”
“I didn’t know it was you at first.”
At first.The shame climbs up my throat.
“How long have you known?”
“I figured it out after those pink cookies were left on my doorstep. I had no clue it was you before that.”They’re called macarons, dickface.
My eyes are burning. I want to cry, but I’ll be damned if I let this motherfucker ever see me shed a tear.
For weeks now he’s let this go on. He let me have phone sex with him! Knowing full well I believed he was someone he wasn’t. He had plenty of opportunities. But no, he’s been watching me, leading me on in conversations, manipulating my feelings. Making me share my secrets. Meanwhile, treating me like I’m less than during every in-person encounter. I’ve been played so hard.
I’m so stupid. It was a website. It was only ever a website, money for nudity. How could I have imagined finding anything more than men who wanted to view me naked? I’ve never been made to feel so cheap. And now he wants to know if he can get the real thing. That’s what the phone sex was about.That’s what all of this is about.
He could have told me before. He could have canceled his subscription like a decent human being and backed away. But no, he thought it would be more exciting to break me in person and see my reaction. See how bad he hurt me up close.
Well,fuck that.
“Get the hell away from me.”
“Wait—” He holds out his hands, like he’s going to somehow explain himself.The nerve.
“No.” As if I’d listen to anything he has to say.
“Can I defend myself?”
I push him away. “I cannot believe you. You’re sick.”
“Why? Because it’s me?”
I swallow the feelings down. My face is on fire. “I didn’t deserve this.”
“I should have said something sooner. I’m sorry.”
Who has he already told? The whole hockey team?
He looks like he’s about to say something, but his mouth just opens and closes, unable to find the words. There are no words.
“Don’t ever speak to me again. Don’t sit at my bar. Don’t watch my videos. Don’t even look in myfuckingdirection,” I seethe.
“Freya—”
I turn my back and walk to the bar, wiping my face to make sure no tears are present.
