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Claudia stops in front of her door and slips her key into the lock. “Go ahead. I need to get ready for work tomorrow anyway.”
I give her a quick kiss on the forehead. “I’ll call you as soon as I’m done.”
As Claudia steps inside and closes the door behind her, I bring the phone to my ear.
“Wheels up in six hours,” Mark says as I unlock the door to my apartment. “There’ll be a team waiting for you when you arrive. We’ll give you more details tomorrow.”
“I’ll be ready.”
“It was nice to finally meet Claudia, by the way,” he says. “Thanks for bringing her along. I hope we didn’t scare her.”
“She’s tougher than she looks.”
He chuckles. “That’s what Charlie said.”
After Mark says goodbye, I start packing. Except for the addition of an extra prosthetic leg and extra liners and antibiotic skin creams, I don’t take long. After eight years in the Teams, I have it down to a science.
Ironically, I’d been considering taking Mark up on his initial offer of working mainly from the office. If there’s one thing the last trip taught me, it’s that I’m not the same man I used to be, not out there in the sandbox. I was fooling myself the entire time, faking it to prove to everyone that I was the same Trevor they knew, the Horseman who let nothing stop him. It took some time, but I’ve come to understand… no, accept my limitations.
But with this latest development, putting in the request to work stateside will have to wait until I come back.
With my bag packed, I make my way to the bathroom and turn on the shower. Gripping the grab bars I’d installed on the walls, I stand under the hot water for as long as I can, knowing this could be my last shower for a while. Funny how I never used to worry about such things, leaving on short notice. Sure, I had to take extra precautions this time around because of my prosthetic leg, but the feeling was the same. I’d rather be somewhere else than home.
But that’s not the case anymore. This time, I’m leaving Claudia behind and I’m not happy about that at all.
I hear my phone vibrating on the bed when I emerge from the bathroom, her name on the display.
Claudia: Everything OK?
I tap her number and she picks up on the second ring. “Sorry I didn’t call you right away. Just got out of the shower.”
“That’s okay. I figured you were busy.”
I set my backpack on the floor near the front door. “Can I come over?”
“Of course.”
Five minutes later, Claudia opens her door wearing one of her favorite PJs with pink unicorns all over, a present from her former roommate back in Philly. The sight of her makes me forget everything else and I pull her to me, my mouth finding her lips, soft and warm.
All I want is to feel her body mold with mine, her arms wrapping around my torso as she rests her head on my chest. In a few hours, I’ll be pushing all thoughts of her out of my mind so I can focus on the mission. I can’t afford to be distracted.
“Can I be with you tonight?” I murmur as I pull her to me again, closing my eyes as I take in her warmth and her softness.
She nods, grabbing my hand. “But not here. Let’s go to my room.”
The moment she closes her bedroom door, I kiss her again, the kiss starting out slow, lips brushing against one another. I don’t even know who kisses who first but it answers an ache from deep inside and that’s all that matters right now.
We tumble on the bed as we tear each other’s clothes off. There’s quiet desperation in our movements, as if she knows what I haven’t yet told her but I’m not about to ruin the moment by opening my big mouth.
No, this moment’s just us. No war. No responsibilities about to tear me away from her.
Just us.
I weave my fingers with hers, pressing her hands against the bed as I kiss her mouth, her jaw, her neck. When I let go of her hands to palm her breasts, Claudia digs her fingernails into my shoulder. It’s a sweet, sharp pain I welcome, a reminder that even with every taste of heaven whenever I’m with her, the agony of hell awaits me the moment I leave.
I’ve never felt this way for anyone before and it scares me. But I also don’t want it any other way. She’s the one. From the moment I set eyes on her at that noisy club, she’s always been the one.
This time, our lovemaking is tender, the connection deeper than anything I’ve felt before. The eye contact, the pauses, the silence between us that feels like a band tightening around my heart, leaves me speechless.
