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It wrenches my stomach to hear her suffer, and all I can do is stand outside the bathroom door waiting to see if she needs anything from me. I’m not going to leave her in there alone.
After a few more minutes, Honey calls out for me, asking for help again.
“I’m sorry,” she says as I help her up. “It’s a side-effect. Sometimes I eat and I’m fine, and other times I end up in the bathroom, losing all contents of my stomach like I’ve been drinking all day and night.”
“You don’t have to apologize, Honey, I understand.”
I get her out of the bathroom and decide to take her back to her bedroom so she can rest. We’ve been talking all morning. She must be drained.
I help Honey into bed, covering her with the blankets. I turn on the bedside lamp, and I see just how thin she’s really gotten.
Her cheekbones are sunken, and her body shivers as she just lies in the bed. When I was carrying her, I could feel her ribs digging into my side, and it hurt to see this incredible, sweet woman hurting like this.
“Honey, can I get you anything? A glass of water? A book? Anything?”
“Jada,” she whispers. “You got me everything I’ve wanted for the last several years. You’re marrying my son.”
I give her the faintest of smiles. “He’s a good man. And he’s done a lot for me since we met. I can’t imagine not marrying him.”
It’s funny. Even that last part doesn’t feel like a lie.
“I’m so happy to hear that, dear.”
Honey closes her eyes, and I take that as my leave to go home and let her rest. I turn off the lamp and walk out of her bedroom, cleaning up after ourselves and leaving the stack of magazines on her kitchen table.
As I get into my car to head back home, I realize that Carter’s wanting this for his mother so soon was the right choice. I’ve come to really appreciate and love Honey. And the fact of the matter is, this wedding is forher. It’s to ensure she gets to see Carter marrying the woman he loves. I may only be fake, but I can play my part pretty well.
But the wedding needs to happen faster. I feel the urgency in my body as I drive. I don’t want to imagine Honey not making it to the wedding, but I find myself beginning to choke up, so I let the thoughts go.
Almost there.
We got this.
I hope.
19
CARTER
We’re at the resort to meet with our wedding planner, and she’s showing us a couple of different options.
“So, as you know, we do weddings all the time here. We have a couple different outlines we can use to get started. Whatever you choose, everything will pretty much be cut and dry. So let’s go through it all together, shall we?”
I don’t really understand everything that the planner is saying, but I watch Jada’s face light up with excitement each time she makes a decision. I like seeing her excited, so I nod along, and insist that whatever the bride wants she can have. We all decide on the banquet hall, mostly because it has windows that go from floor-to-ceiling and it overlooks the ocean.
Jada seems to be enjoying herself as she makes her choices, she and the planner laughing together about certain things. Jada brings up an interesting color combo for the flowers, and she mentions she hasn’t bought her dress, though she has an idea of what she wants it to be. She mentions a mermaid dress with lace and pearls that accent the neck of the dress, and says she knows it’ll be perfect.
Thankfully, the concept is pretty simplistic, and at the end of the meeting I’m caught up on everything that the ladies have decided on.
Once we finish with the planner, Jada stands and gives her a hug, and I shake her hand, thanking her for all her help.
I ask Jada if she wants to walk with me for a bit, and she agrees. We set off on our usual walk through the resort. We don’t say much, but after a few minutes, Jada points out the firepit in the lounge, and we make our way over to sit and enjoy it.
“I love this spot. I love the warmth of the fire. It’s relaxing.” Jada closes her eyes and leans her head back, taking a deep breath.
“Is this everything you want?” I ask her, realizing that this question will make no sense out of context. “The wedding. Is this what you dreamed of when you imagined your wedding?”
She smiles, still with her eyes closed. “Even though it’s fake?”
