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Nope.
There is no way I can be pregnant.
I count on my fingers when we were in New York.
It’s been maybe just over four weeks? Doesn’t morning sickness kick in much later than that?
I quickly grab my phone and google it…oh…five to six weeks onwards. So it’s unlikely…
And I’m on birth control. I’ve been actively taking it…but we haven’t been using any other protection…I mean, I can’t be pregnant, regardless. I can’t.
Maybe I have the stomach flu. These things do go around.
I hold a hand to my stomach and try not to panic.
My period is due…any day now. I’m sure it’ll be fine. It’s not that.
My stomach is always the most sensitive part of my body. Whenever I have a worry or feel troubled, it goes straight to my stomach.
I take a couple of deep breaths and steady myself once more.
I’m sure I’m just worked up from having a panic attack. There’s been a lot going on around here lately. It’s only natural that it’ll come out somehow.
It’s just stress.
That’s all.
* * *
I don’t have any more bouts of sickness, thank god, and I hang out with Rayne, watching Netflix as we wait for more information on the boys’ whereabouts.
To say we’re both on tenterhooks is an understatement.
Even Married at First Sight can’t keep my interest. All I keep thinking about is Dante.
“I had a bit of an episode earlier,” I say, trying to sound casual.
She turns to look at me. “What kind of episode?”
I don’t want to divulge the vomiting thing because that’s just silly. I don’t want her to worry even more, but I have to say something because we’ve always been honest with each other.
“I had a mild panic attack.”
Her eyes widen as she sits up, sloshing her wine on the floor. “Why didn’t you call me?”
“I was kinda working through it.”
“Mia, I’m sorry. I could’ve come and helped.”
I shake my head. “Time didn’t really permit, but I got out of it before it got worse.”
She rubs her hands on my arms. “Are you okay?”
I nod. “I did my exercises, just like the therapist showed me.”
She smiles softly and says, “What brought it on?”
I look down at my hands, twisting them in my lap. “I was thinking about Dante. I’m worried about him.”
