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I hate the past tense she uses, and she whispers, “You were everything to me. I loved you from the moment we knocked heads and you stared at me like nobody had ever stared at me before. You captured my heart in that moment and I would have done anything for you. Idideverything for you.”
“I don’t understand.”
I’m confused, and she grips my hands a little tighter and whispers, “You were my secret. The most treasured secret I never thought I’d hold. The local bad boy. A sinner in the eyes of the town. I couldn’t admit to anyone how I felt about you because the brainwashed part of me was telling me that you were a devil sent by God to tempt me.”
She rolls her eyes. “A lifetime of indoctrination counted for not a lot in the end because I discovered that love writes its own story and I fell for you hard.”
“You are talking in the past tense, baby. I’m waiting for when it all changed.”
I tense as I wait for her to break my heart all over again and am surprised when she drops my right hand and, reaching out, touches my face with a gentle pressure that is so good.
“I never stopped loving you, Jonny. How could I? You are my soul mate and if that means I have the soul of the devil, I will live with that.”
I gaze into her eyes, having lost the power of speech as she whispers, “I ran to protect you, Jonny. To protect Hope and to protect myself. You understand how it works in Heaven. If my parents learned I was pregnant, they would have the child beaten out of me.”
I know she’s right and say angrily, “That is precisely why you should have come to me. I would have taken care of you.”
“You were leaving.” She sounds so sad about that and says in a shaky voice. “You had a life outside Heaven. You had done the unthinkable and escaped. When you returned, I realized it wouldn’t be for long and never thought for one second I deserved the right to ask you to take me with you.”
I open my mouth the protest and she rests her finger against it and says sorrowfully, “I couldn’t ask that of you, Jonny. To fight the town who would have shot you like a dog in the streets while I was made to watch. To be stoned like a witch for my sins and lose the life we had created from love. I ran to avoid all of that to protect us all. Our unborn baby and the life you had fought so hard to change. I ran to save us Jonny, and I thought I had succeeded.”
Her voice trembles and I snarl, “Then how did they find you?”
Faith shakes her head. “Please, Jonny. Can we leave this because I am so tired, and Hope will wake soon for another feed?”
She smiles softly and whispers, “I’ll tell you everything in the morning, but tonight …” She hesitates.
“Please, will you just hold me?”
I make to pull her into my arms, and she hesitates before saying, “Not here. Um, well ….”
Her face flushes with embarrassment, which makes me smile. There she is, my innocent angel who just can’t help wanting something she shouldn’t.
“It will be my pleasure, darlin’.” I whisper huskily and as I take her hand, I pull her to her feet and as we head up the stairs to bed, I already know I’m in for a torturous night.
CHAPTER31
FAITH
Once again, I thank Ashton and Bonnie because everything I need is waiting for me. I shower and wash my hair, scrubbing every inch of the town I left behind from my body and wish it was as easy from my mind.
I drop the hated dress into the trash basket and pull on a beautiful satin slip to sleep in. Everything here is decadent and desirable, and so is the man waiting for me in the bedroom.
My heart beats furiously as I prepare to lie next to Jonny. It will be the first time because our time together was always snatched moments in hidden places. We were always conscious of being discovered, which brought a certain kind of urgency to our times together.
Tonight, is different. We have our space and for some reason I’m even more nervous because there is nowhere left to hide. I have dreamed of this moment ever since I met him and now the reality is scaring the shit out of me.
It feels so wrong to head into the softly lit room to offer myself to a man who is not my husband, but I realize it’s just my upbringing coming back to bite me.
My heart quickens when I see him sitting on the edge of the bed, a white dressing gown covering his naked flesh, which is probably for my benefit.
He stares up at me as I head into the room, conscious of the soft fabric molding to my curves, and his eyes flash with desire that makes my heart skip a beat as he whispers softly, “You are so beautiful, Faith. You always were the prettiest girl in Heaven and now I know you are the most beautiful woman in the world.”
I blush as he laughs softly and reaches out his hand, whispering, “Come here.”
I don’t know how my body moves I’m so nervous, but it has its own agenda and apparently can’t reach him quickly enough.
As his hand runs around my waist, his eyes glitter as he whispers, “We can take it slow. Just sleep tonight if that’s what you want. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”
