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Me: We’ve got a dinner at the Bing’s and then tomorrow we’ve got a lunch, but I can’t remember where right now.
Adeline: Tell me you’re staying off social media.
Me: I haven’t looked at any of it since Monday. I took your advice. But Alan sure lets me know things aren’t good.
Charlize: We’re here for you, Kristen. Anytime.
Me: Thank you.
* * *
I manageto stay off social media all week until Friday morning.
After waking alone because Bradford had a super early meeting at his office he had to leave for before six a.m., I begin going about my morning, getting ready for the busy day ahead, and doing my best not to think about the fact his parents and some of his brothers are coming over tonight. It’s been a long week and I haven’t heard from my mother since I saw her on Tuesday, which has kept my thoughts in a spiral. I’ve also had to deal with Alan every day. Not what I’d choose as a life preference. And on top of these things, I’ve spent each day trying to keep my head held high while people whisper about me and Bradford everywhere I go. Time alone with Bradford on Sunday can’t come soon enough.
I’m dressed and almost out the door when I receive a text from Lila James, the woman who plans the yearly class reunions.
Lila: I’m so looking forward to meeting Bradford next month! I hope you’re both okay after all the nasty things that have been posted on social media overnight. I’m thinking of you XO
I stare at my phone and am quite certain that after all these years of denying myself, I need to bring sugar into my home. I think if I didn’t have to leave the condo to source my daily allowance of one coffee with sugar, I could drink it right now and avoid social media.
I take a deep breath and force the idea of checking social media from my mind. However, when I receive a text from Jenna asking me if I’m okay, that’s it. I need to know what lies have been published about us now.
I check one of the most trusted Instagram gossip accounts first. They don’t post lies, just facts and have always been kind to me even while sharing gossip about me.
@thetea_gasp
Holy wow,girlfriends, vibe check on the whole @kristenblaise x @bradfordblack situation? The scandal they caused when they decided it would be fun to forget he was engaged and run off to Vegas to get married is cray right now. We’ve never eaten so much popcorn in one week. It’s been six days since they had that special moment with Elvis and while Kristen’s fashion has never been so on point (I mean, look at her drippin’!), she’s never looked as exhausted. Not even when @johnathonswindle’s body count was revealed. While we’re torn over wanting to have an excuse to eat more popcorn, we also just want our girl to be happy. We hope the storm finishes blowing through her life soon because this is not the #goals we wanted for her. Girl deserves to be able to enjoy that #zaddy in peace and welcome in her #sliving era.
Right.So maybe I shouldn’t have checked there first. Exhausted? Of course I look exhausted. I’m fucking drained by the disinformation that’s been spread about me. And since I’ve been offline most of the week, I don’t even know the half of it yet.
I rectify that, and half an hour later, I wish I hadn’t.
The new lies are that 1) Cecelia was pregnant with Bradford’s child and miscarried this week because of the stress Bradford’s cheating caused her. Bradford couldn’t care less and has been spotted out socializing every night with the woman who caused this scandal. Spoiler alert: that woman is me. And 2) Some old photos from various galas over the year have surfaced that feature me and Bradford. They’re group photos that have us standing with not only our partners at the time, but with other couples too. However, the gossip is that we were cheating on our partners back then. The other part of this lie is that I coerced Bradford into marrying me, that he wasn’t thinking straight because I lured him with sex. Please, have these people met the man? No one forces Bradford Black into anything. If I could, I wouldn’t waste that power on forcing him into marriage; I’d force him to entertain my bad girl all day long.
There are many other random pieces online about my colorful dating history, my loose ways (their words, not mine), that I’m only out for Bradford’s money (if only they knew how he forced half his cash on me in the postnup and is refusing to give me the bed anytime soon), that I’m already cheating on Bradford with someone else (these people clearly have no idea that when Bradford fucks a woman, he gets the job done so well she has no energy left for pretty much anything else, let alone sex with another man), that Bradford is also cheating on me (see the previous point; I mean, I love his dick, but it doesn’t have superpowers that I’m aware of), that his family refuse to welcome me, and that even my father has disowned me because I’m a disgrace.
That last point hurt, and it causes me to stop scrolling and shove my phone in my purse. I have a job interview this morning with a publishing company that I need to stay focused for; thinking about this gossip won’t help me with that.
It turns out that I should not have gotten out of bed today. In the history of Fridays, this one soon becomes my absolute least favorite one of life.
39
Kristen
My job interview goes badly. And when I say badly, I mean it’s one of the most hideous experiences of my life.
The woman interviewing me is more interested in discussing the scandals of my life. She brings up my marriage first, congratulating me but then subtly casting aspersions on it. Then, she mentions my failed engagement to Johnathon and fishes for more information on that time of my life. Right after I manage to dissuade her from that interrogation, she asks me why I no longer work for my father. The glint in her eye tells me she knows the answer to this already and I soon decide that she only called me in for an interview as a form of entertainment.
I feel frayed by the time I leave the interview. Bradford told me to call him once I was done and let him know how it went, but when I call, he’s in a meeting. Jane tells me she’ll have him return my call when he’s free even though I let her know he doesn’t need to. I get the impression she’s been given strict instructions by my husband that she should never keep me from him.
After the interview, I go to my condo and pack some more of my belongings. I’ve only managed to sort through clothes, shoes, purses, and books so far, which means I’ve still got a lot to pack. Bradford dropped by quickly yesterday and suggested we hire movers to do it all for me, but I told him I want to go through everything myself. It’s a big life change and I need to take a minute with it.
I spend a few hours packing and when I leave just after lunchtime, I run into one of my neighbors who makes some offensive comments about sluts who steal other women’s men. I’m so stunned that I forget how to speak for a second. This only encourages her to keep going. However, I recover quickly and let her know what I think of her sharing her opinion with me and also exactly what I think of her using that derogatory term.
I’m wild by the time I finish with her. Furious that there are still women who exist who think using words likeslutto put another woman down is okay. When I pay the dictionary people off with Bradford’s money to add my new word, which I have yet to devise, I will take another billion from him and begin a campaign to teach people to do better.
My afternoon does not improve.
