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I shake my head, rubbing the back of my neck. “You don’t have anything to be sorry for.”
“No,” she continues, sitting up taller in her chair, blinking a few times before settling on me. “Yes I do. I could have been a lot more sensitive about the situation. I was up all night thinking about it. It’s not that I don’t ever imagine us being together, Jamie. It’s just not something I can handle, right now.”
“Okay,” I say slowly. I can tell she isn’t done, but something in her head is preventing her from continuing.
“Aside from the physical relationship, we had an amazing friendship.”
“Friendship,” I nod with a frown. “Is this the part where you’re going to friendzone me and tell me we’re going to raise our kids as BFFs?”
Her sweet giggle is like music to my ears. “No!” she laughs, taking a sip of her lemonade when she calms down. “I’m not friendzoning you.”
“Then what are you trying to say, Red? Spit it out.”
“I’m trying to ask you if you’re okay with just being friends until I’m ready.”
My eyebrows pull down without thought. “Until you’re ready?”
She nods, biting her juicy lip. “I’m just asking you to give me time and space to come to terms with everything. I’m just not ready for what you are wanting.”
“But you’re saying that, one day, youwillbe ready?”
She shrugs her shoulders, letting out a frustrated breath. “I can’t promise that. I don’t know what all got fucked up in my head that day.”
“Don’t say that,” I murmur.
“It’s true. I’m going to therapy though, and it’s helping.”
Her smile gives me hope. It fucking sucks that the first and only time in my entire life that I want to be all in with someone, she can’t. I would never blame her for it, but it really fucking sucks.
“I’ll be your friend, Red. As long as you know that, one day, you will be mine.”
“That scares me.”
“Being mine?” I rear back. “Why does that scare you?”
“I’ve never been anyone's anything before.”
“Well get prepared, Red, because one day, you will be everything.” I round the corner when I see my phone light up with the pizza delivery alert. “My girl. My wife. My world. My everything.”
I take advantage of the fact that I’ve stunned her to silence and drop a kiss on top of her head before continuing to the front door.
I hear her phone ring behind me as soon as I get to the front door.
I pay the guy and whistle to get the guys attention as they shuffle through the last few boxes on the trailer. I gesture to the pizza boxes and nod for them to come inside.
When I come back into the kitchen, Pebbles is holding the phone out in front of her. Her entire phone screen is taken up by a video call with Winnie.
“Please! What the hell else do you have going on on a Thursday night?” Winnie’s voice crackles over the phone.
“I said I would think about it,” Pebbles giggles and rolls her eyes while smiling at her friend.
“Who is there with you?” Winnie asks. I assume she can hear Lee and Jett voicing how excited they are for the pizza.
“I’m at the house. Trigger and the guys are here. They brought over all my stuff from the apartment.”
“Trigger! Make her come to birthing classes with me!” Winnie yells to me.
I chuckle at the scowl that Pebbles aims at the screen.
