Page 13 of Fire and Ash


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I start to storm off toward my car, but something catches my eye. He’s standing next to a thin foam mattress on the floor, and the thing in his hands is a pillow. He’s wearing socks. But no shoes.

And the fight in me suddenly dissolves like paper in water.

He sees me looking and tries to step in my way to block me from seeing the proof that he’s obviously sleeping in this filthy garage.

“Pax,” I mumble, letting my eyes trail up to his face. His jaw tightens and he looks away. “Are you sleeping here?” I ask gently.

“I’m fine. It’s just something I do from time to time. Have a good night, Mr. Litchfield,” he mutters before turning to toss the pillow on the mattress.

Jesus, is this kid...homeless?

“Stop,” I bark. As he glares up at me, his warm copper eyes soak up the fluorescent lights. “You can’t sleep here.”

“I told you, I’m fine. Now get the fuck out of here, please,” he barks, and I can see how uncomfortable it is for him to show any kind of weakness.

I can’t believe I’m even considering this—I just met this guy yesterday, but he’s a student, and Everly and Cullen know him, so he’s not a complete stranger. “Come stay at my place tonight.”

“Just fuck off, Thomas.”

Of course he’s going to be a stubborn asshole. A little voice in my head says,just leave him. He said he’s fine and at least you offered.But dammit, something about this guy catches me off guard. It’s the scars and the wall he puts up that make me want to get through to him. It’s the vulnerability I know he’s afraid to feel and the fact that he’s never going to make things easy for me, but maybe I’m tired of easy. Maybe I want a challenge and Pax Smith is definitely that.

Whatever the reason is, I’m about to stoke the flames that are already burning.

“If you don’t take me up on my offer, Pax...I might accidentally forget to keep your little secret. I’d hate for the whole team to find out the truth.”

He moves so fast it throws me off-kilter. His large hand is around my neck, and my back is slammed hard against the wall. His face is just inches from mine, his sneer so close to my cheek, I can feel the warmth of his breath on my skin.

“I hope you’re not fucking blackmailing me right now, Mr. Litchfield.”

“So what if I am.”

“I said I was fine,” he growls.

“Yeah well, I’m not. I can’t just leave you here.”

At this moment, he’s actually quite intimidating. Towering over me, his body pressed up against mine, I’m dwarfed in comparison, but I’m not afraid of him. I think he wants me to be, and there’s no doubt he could very easily hurt me, but I know he won’t. I know that Pax Smith is far more cornered than I am. He’s been abused or neglected and when threatened, he’d rather scare you away than risk being hurt again.

I want to help him, but the problem is, I don’t know how to reach him. Behind this mean facade and scary exterior is a guy I know wants to be soft and maybe even taken care of. He started it with me. He could have literally watched me walk away without touching me yesterday, but he didn’t, and I have to believe that me being older than him held some sort of appeal. Deep down, he needs someone like me. I just have to make him see it.

I gently wrap my hands around his wrists and coax him into releasing his grip on me.

“Come on,” I say. “Let’s make a deal. You call the shots, okay? You want to come to my house and have your way with me, okay. You want to tell me to fuck off and crash on my couch, okay. I’ll leave you alone. Want to be a dick to me in front of the whole class and the rugby team, just to be sure no one suspects anything? Fine. I don’t care. You call the shots, Pax.”

Finally, he lets go of my shirt long enough to let me breathe without the force of his body pinning me to the cinder block wall. But I don’t let go of his wrists, at least not right away.

When I do release him, the anger drains from his face and he replaces it with confusion. “Why the fuck are you being so nice to me?”

Nice? This is a step above basic decency, but he must have had to deal with a lot of fucked-up assholes in his life to see this as me being nice. I don’t really want to point that out, so instead I just reply, “Beats the fuck out of me.”

6

PAX

Ican swallow down the embarrassment of being caught sleeping in the garage. I can even handle the shame of taking charity from someone I barely know. What I can’t fucking handle is Thomas being so fucking nice when all I’ve been is a complete asshole to him.

It feels like the more I try to push this guy away, the more he keeps coming back. I’ve been nothing but an ignorant, self-absorbed asshole since the moment I ambushed him in the office yesterday and fucked him without so much as a greeting.

I follow him to his place, which, of course, is downtown. It’s a small condo, but I’m willing to bet he paid a shit ton for it. I feel so exposed when I park my car in his driveway. Aphrodite is not subtle. If people see it parked here, they will know it’s me.

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