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Kayden nodded. “With the right back story, something about you going undercover, with detailed documentation to back it up, we could get you back working for him. Get you inside.”
“What does that even mean?” Josh asked, confused.
I gave Josh one last squeeze, and then stepped away, putting space between us, unconsciously separating myself from him so I could keep him safe. “It means I have to go back.”
Josh was horrified. “What? You took me from their protection. Surely they’ll be all over that? Won’t you get arrested? That makes no sense?”
My chest tightened as I considered the options. I knew what Kayden was going to say next. That me going back on my own with a cover story to explain why I’d taken Josh from the FBI wouldn’t wash unless Josh and Ben came back as part of the deal.
“I’ll go back with you, make it look legitimate,” Josh said.
“I’m the only one going back,” I declared. “Me.”
“Not on your own,” Josh pushed.
“On my own.”
I expected Kayden to disagree, but all he did was shrug.
“If you think you can sell it,” he murmured.
“I can sell it—”
“Wait, no.” Josh interrupted. “Danvers is the first domino you need to fall. Okay, I understand that. Then, once Rouxier has no dedicated team of federal agents fooled into protecting him, then the links with the cartels and the kids that they hurt, kids younger than Ben—they would be next to fall.”
“Josh—” I began.
Kayden spoke over me. “That’s right.”
“Okay, then this is what happens, no argument. I want Ben protected. He’s everything to me, okay? But if I need to go back with Ethan to sell this, then that’s what I’m doing.”
And the world fell from beneath my feet.
ChapterNineteen
Josh
“I’m going,”I said with determination. “I’m helping Ethan to end this.”
Kayden agreed. “It makes complete sense for Josh to be part of the backstory. Playing up the relationship angle—”
“Not. Fucking. Happening.” Ethan bit out. “I’m not letting the man that I … I’m not letting Josh leave the safe house.”
“Wait a minute, that’s my choice,” I said.
Ethan shook his head. Then I was being guided, aka tugged, into the comms room by a frustrated and pissed-off Ethan. It was evident that he wasn’t behind any idea of me going back with him, but what else could I do? Somehow, being with Ethan made me brave, and I wanted to do something about an awful situation.
Surely, I owed it to myself and to Ben to try?
He closed the door behind us, which didn’t bode well for whatever what he was going to say next.
“I can’t play this without you being safe back here with Ben,” he stated then leaned against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest, his expression implacable. His body language screamed he was shutting down and reverting to closed-off superhero mode. An errant thought—that he was so damned hot—passed through my confused thoughts, and for a moment, nothing made sense. I knew why I was here—because I’d paid for a hooker in a bar and gotten myself involved in something way beyond my pay grade. The whole Rouxier part of this horror story was so nebulous that none of it made any sense, and I felt as if I was not being given all the important information.
“How badisRouxier?” I wondered if I should ask if my ex-wife was safe with her new fiancé, but she was a grown woman and she’d made choices I had no control over. The only control I did have, was getting full custody of Ben, and look how bad I’d fucked that up.
“It doesn’t matter how bad he is, I don’t want you leaving here. Think about it—how will Ben react if the only stability he has in his life disappears again? So far it’s like this huge adventure, but staying here with strangers… Tell me you think that’s a good thing? Explain to me how leaving Ben is the right thing to do.”
I slumped into the nearest chair, and it scooted backward, hitting the desk. I didn’t have the energy to stand and fight, because the dad part of me was desperate to grab Ben and never leave his side again, and it was that side that Ethan wanted to encourage. Not the side of me that wanted to help.
