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I need my mask, my poker face.
I swallow thickly and bite down my upper lip, battling my madly beating heart until, breath after breath, it slows down a bit.
I can’t be vulnerable. Not now and not ever.
This is no different than when I step into the boardroom.
Derek is just another man who wants something from me, no matter what I’m feeling.
I need to be the Ice Queen once again.
I make myself speak with a calm and collected voice that couldn't be farther from how I really feel inside.
"Where are we going, Derek? You said you just wanted to get a cup of coffee. We have passed at least three coffee shops and two diners."
He smiles at me. This big, dazzling smile that lights something inside of me and makes my heart dance to a tune I don't want to hear. It's too painful down this road. I can't bring myself to take another step.
Why the hell did I let him drag me into this fucking car?
"If I say something, Carina, it's always the truth, believe me. I do want to get a cup of coffee, but I also want to talk, you know that. We can't simply forget about what happened last Saturday. Plus, I don't really want to. What about you?"
I avoid the question. "That still doesn't tell me where the hell you are taking me."
My voice is so cold I can barely recognize it, but Derek seems unfazed like he can see past my ruse or something.
He nods slightly, his fingers tapping absentmindedly on the steering wheel. "Well, I figured that, given the nature of the topic, we would fare much better if we talked privately, and since I don’t live that far away…” he lets the rest of his words slide, his intense stare is on me again, almost daring me to disagree.
I bristle a little. “You didn’t seem to have issues being very public about private matters Saturday night,” I jab.
I don’t know why I’m lashing out at him. I’m a ball of nerves.
To my surprise, he doesn’t take the bait and instead chuckles sexily. His laugh is rich and warm, like freshly ground coffee, and I feel it all the way to my clit.
“You can sheathe those claws, baby. I don't want to get into a fight, and something tells me that neither do you, and if you're doing this to get a rise out of me, I assure you… you don't need to provoke me any further."
I see one of his eyebrows arch before he slowly looks down at his lap.
I follow his gaze, and my own eyebrows rush to my hairline, meeting the unmistakable sight of the enormous bulge obscenely tenting his finely cut slacks.
He totally turned my own words against me. Not to mention the fact that he totally turnedmeon in the process. I can feel my nipples hardening and my pulse picking up a frenzied tempo all over again.
Well, he is a lawyer, aside from being a CEO. I should have expected this.
“Oh…”
That's the only sound that comes from my mouth, and I feel like a perfect idiot after emitting it.
“Let’s not worry about my misbehaving southern region right now… I can hardly help it when you are around me, but it doesn’t mean we have to put it to good use.”
“Don’t we?” I murmur, trying to look him in the eye.
Derek smiles a little, and I feel my cheeks blushing crimson.
“Whatever you think my intentions are, you are wrong. There’s something between us. Something deep. Something different from anything I’ve ever felt. Something that I need. I just want to talk, Carina. I reallydomean it.”
I look inside my heart for that little spark of hope, that trust, but I can’t believe him. I just can’t.
So he wants to take me to his place totalk.
