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I filled my bowl with milk as I cautiously said, “Sure. I’ll call this morning. I must fix the locks and things I didn’t get to yesterday. Would you…help me?”
“I don’t know how.”
“Just hand me tools and keep me company, then.”
“Why? You hate me. Everyone hates me.”
I returned the carton to the table and whispered, “They don’t hate you. I don’t hate you, Theo. Not at all.”
His deep eyes met mine, and he stared there, searching for the truth. “How come?”
“I see what maybe you’re trying so hard to hide from most people. Not all the time, but I see him. That Theo, you don’t show often.”
He lowered his eyes to his food and said, “I don’t like myself much.”
“Why don’t we start there? You said you didn’t know yourself. If what little you know you don’t like, there is plenty of time and opportunity to change. I know you thought everyone blew you off yesterday, but Theo, they were all helping us, and they all said goodbye to you, smiling. It’s a start, okay?”
“I guess. You…like me?”
If I were truthful with myself, I would come to many conclusions I shouldn’t. I worked for the man. The number one no-no of a bodyguard was not to fall for their principals, but Theo…from the first second I saw him, past the fury he brought up in me, there was something more profound. I yearned for the guy.
He wasn’t my usual type, so small and more like a twink with his hairless chest than my preference for a bigger guy with some body hair. Still, the way his eyes clouded like a bolt of lightning…his tiny body was beautiful, and he was too. He was…just absolutely beautiful.
“I like you, Theo. I’d probably be able to like you more if I didn’t have to keep you safe. Friendships in this business are hard. Getting too close to a client, it’s not wise.”
“My cousin is married to his bodyguard. I think we could handle…friendship.”
His lips were chewed, and his eyes refused to meet mine for more than a second or two, but I saw how stiff he was, and with his body language alone, he told me of his insecurity. “Okay. We’ll work on a friendship.”
“I…” He fidgeted and pushed away his bowl. “I apologize ahead of time for being…rude.”
“Okay. And I apologize ahead of time for throwing you in with the pigs again for being rude.”
His eyes widened a bit until he saw me smiling. “That’s not funny.”
“Sure, it is.”
He went along with me to help get the place more secure. He didn’t know a wrench from a screwdriver, but he learned quickly. We didn’t talk a lot while we were working; mostly, I think Theo was letting me concentrate on the job. Still, it felt as if he were holding back a lot.
When we were finished, I thanked him for helping me, and he lifted his chin, giving me a rather pleasant “You’re welcome.”
We had lunch, more sandwiches, and the old Theo reared again. “If I keep eating all this bread, I’ll be as fat as that person that works for me.”
“That’s fucking mean, Theo.”
“But true. I need protein, not carbs.”
That made me smile as I cut the Havarti. Protein…how I’d love to give him some. “I’ll keep that in mind, you know, next time I go shopping.”
“I don’t see why I can’t go. I told you that Jamiah would never tell a soul where I am.”
“Forgive me for not trusting him, but I don’t. I don’t trust you either, and that’s nothing against you. I don’t trust many people.”
“That’s at least one thing we have in common. I don’t trust you either.”
“Shame. All I want is to keep you safe, Theo. If you don’t trust me personally, that’s fine, and I can understand that. I hope you trust that my job is to make you safe.”
“Your job,” he whispered rather sadly. “Sure. I guess I trust you to do your job. You seem…capable.”
