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Yes, technically, I think, but I don’t say it.
“I need you to drive me to the hospital,” I say firmly, and Derek stands up, pulling on a shirt and a pair of sweats quickly.
“What’s going on?” he asks, and I shake my head.
“I don’t know, but I’m bleeding.”
Derek looks at me like I’mverynaïve, and part of me wants to hit him. “Like...your period?”
His face is flushed.
“Worse,” I say. “Listen, I just need you to take me. I’m sorry but I shouldn’t be driving like this—”
“What’s going on, Kenna? Are you feeling a neckache again?” he asks, sliding on his flipflops.
Derek grabs Maggie in one arm and Eli in the other and rushes with them to the car. They’re both still sleeping when he straps them in.
“I’ll call my Mom to come get them,” he mutters as he slides into the driver’s side, glancing at me now and again on the ride to the hospital. He calls his mother on the way and she agrees to come and pick them up.
She makes it there before we do, since she lives closer to the hospital, and takes the sleepy kids to put into her car.
Derek follows me into the hospital and stands up when they call me back.
“Not yet,” I tell him. “I’ll call if I need you.” I don’t want him to know about the baby if this pregnancy falls through. It would only hurt him, and I’m already hurting for the both of us, no need for him to be upset for something that almost happened.
Derek frowns, but sits back down.
As soon as I’m in the back and the physician’s assistant comes in, I blurt out, “I’m eleven weeks pregnant, I just got released two days ago due to meningitis, and now I’m bleeding.”
The young woman leaves the room and brings back in an ultrasound machine and a fetal heartbeat monitor, and my heart is in my throat while she searches for the heartbeat with the wand. It seems to take her forever to find it and I just know I’m going to scream, but finally the whooshing sound of the baby’s heartbeat sounds in my ears.
I sigh in relief.
“Baby seems okay,” she says gently. “Sometimes there’s a bit of spotting, especially after some more extenuating activity or sexual intercourse.”
I groan inwardly. I should have known. I feel stupid and at the verge of tears.
“Your husband is asking about you. Should I bring him back?” she asks, and I nod tiredly, not explaining that he’s technically just my boss and also, the baby’s father.
I don’t want to get into that with a stranger when I haven’t even told him.
Derek hurries into the room after the doctor leaves, and I don’t even bother hiding the fetal monitor. At this point, I have to tell him.
He doesn’t seem to notice, sitting next to me immediately and taking my hand.
“Is it the meningitis?” he asks worriedly.
I shake my head. “No, just...stress,” I say vaguely, and Derek’s green eyes look so concerned that I can’t stop myself from crying.
“Kenna, what’s wrong?” he asks softly. “Are you in pain?”
“No,” I sniffle. “I just...I need to tell you something, Derek.”
“Anything,” he says, leaning down to kiss my knuckles, and that just makes me cry harder.
I gesture over to the fetal monitor, showing him the heartbeat.
“What...what’s that?” he asks hesitantly.
