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“Oh.” Pushing on my chest, she lifted enough to see my face. “Really?”
“With you, it’s all or nothing for me. You’re different from my other thralls. Special.”
Mine.
She rested her head on my shoulder again and toyed with the ends of my hair. “So where does that leave us? You’re going to keep me here as your slave?”
My hand tightened on her nape. I knew she wanted me to deny it, to tell her that she was free to go if that’s what she really wanted. But I couldn’t bring myself to lie to her.
“For now, yes.”
She tensed and pushed away. I resisted for a few seconds, then forced my fingers to open. She rolled onto her back and dropped her arm over her eyes.
“I should’ve known better than to fall in love with a vampire,” she said under her breath.
I shook my head, certain I’d misunderstood. “You love me?”
“Maybe. I’m still making up my mind.”
I came over top of her and nudged her arm off her eyes so I could see her expression. “You love me,” I stated firmly.
Her dark brows snapped together. “Yes, damn you. Maybe not that first night, but I felt something even back then. Leaving you was the hardest thing I ever did.”
Awe slashed at my heart, filled it with a raw, burning hope.
She meant it.
She didn’t want to mean it, but she did.
I cupped her face, carefully, gently. Trying to show her without words how precious she was to me. “Thank you.” I rested my forehead against hers.
“It’s not something you thank someone for.”
“To me, it is. You have to stay with me now.”
She sighed. Her fingers came around my wrists. “Oh, Brien. It doesn’t work like that.”
The awe fled, leaving a jagged, painful space where hope had flamed. I pulled away from her. I thought again of how she was still keeping things from me.
“I see.”
Her grip tightened on my wrists. Her eyes moved between mine. “What do you see?”
That you ‘love’ me like you love chocolate or sex or your silver Pradas. Because if your ‘love’ doesn’t keep you with me, what the fuck is it good for?
“Nothing.” I lifted her off me and reached for our clothes. “We should go back.”
19
TWILIGHT
Iwas used to keeping my secrets.
Telling Brien things about my life had left me feeling more exposed than sex or offering him my throat.
That was my body. My secrets were my soul.
And it wasn’t enough. He kept pulling back, even after I’d told him I’d loved him.
