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My heart constricts as I consider how lonely he has been—how lonely all of us have been without one another.
“I’m sorry,” I say, feeling the sorrowfulness of the situation keenly.
“What are you sorry for?”he asks, eyes wide in confusion.“Nothing happened to me.I just missed the two of you.”
“Is that what you tell yourself?”My tone is gentle, trying to get him up to open.“That you’re untouched by all this?”
He nods.“It’s easier to shove everything under the rug.”
Holding out my hand invitingly, I motion for him to come closer.“Come sit with me,” I plead quietly.
A lump rises in my throat before I speak.“If something had happened to you—if you had been taken away from me—it would’ve broken me.”
“You want me to admit that it fucking broke me?”Frustration edges his voice, anger surfacing like a tidal wave.
“Recognizing there’s a problem is the first step,” I reply, trying to soothe his temper.
“I’m not the one who was broken,” he says in a low voice.“But some days I feel like I need someone to save me, drag me from the fucking hell where I landed.It’s easy to pretend that I’m not affected.Most people believe me.”
I capture his hand and place a kiss on each fingertip.“I’m not most people.I’m a part of you, after all, and I know.If I had been close, I would’ve noticed, but thinking about the past won’t help either of us, will it?”
His lips stretch into a grin.“You know what would help?”he teases.
Despite his effort to lighten the mood, I remain steadfast.“If we lay out a plan for you to seek help, we can make everything better for you.”
He raises an eyebrow playfully, his hand wandering up my bare leg, halting where the fabric of my shorts begins.“Can we have sex before that?”
With a light slap on his wandering hand and a chuckle, I reply, “Nope.”
“Babe, I’m back and ready to do the work,” he says.“Not because you or Grey asked me, but because I want to be whole for myself and you two.”
“Would you consider couples’ counseling?”I question.
“Sure, I said anything—within reason,” he replies with a smirk.
I raise an eyebrow at his comment.“So there are limits?”
“I don’t know, but I’d like a buffer in case you two come up with something outrageous,” he responds.
And this conversation feels like the old times.He’s right.Sometimes Grey and I would come up with ideas that seem slightly over the top.Like the time we decided to hike all the fourteeners in Colorado in less than a week.It seemed like a great idea, but San put his foot down and said it was not just a hike.We needed training.
“Can you tell me about your sex embargo?”he asks gently.“You know I respect it if you choose to continue it with me, right?”
I don’t hesitate to explain to him what I already explained to Grey.Why I had it, and how I don’t need the embargo anymore.This time, I don’t cry as much.Of course, he ends up hugging me and telling me soothing words.
“How can I make this better?”
“Love me,” I whisper, my voice quivering with desire, as I wrap my arms around his neck and settle onto his lap.My fingers glide through his hair, savoring the silky strands, while our lips connect in a tender, intoxicating kiss.
His kiss holds a tenderness that steals my breath away, leaving me yearning for more.My heart quickens its beat, responding to the urgent rhythm echoing within me.It feels as if I’m melting into him, his warmth permeating my very core and igniting a fire that courses through my veins.
With gentle precision, his fingertips trace a trail of electric anticipation along my back, my shoulders, and up to my neck, leaving a delightful tingling sensation in their wake.As his lips trail along the curve of my collarbone, his hand slowly tugs up the hem of my shirt, unveiling a surge of excitement within me.In one fluid motion, I discard his jacket and peel off his shirt, the anticipation causing my heart to race.
His hands continue their exploration, gliding over my sides, delicately tracing the contours of my body, each touch sending delicious shivers of pleasure through me.It’s as if his touch carries a secret language, whispering promises of passion against my skin.I gasp as he pauses, his fingertips tracing the outline of my breast, electrifying my senses.
The warmth of his breath, the tantalizing heat of his lips inching closer, stirs a feverish ache deep within me.As he teasingly caresses my nipples, a wave of exquisite pleasure crashes over me, causing me to instinctively lean farther into him.
My heart pounds within my chest, a wild rhythm matching the intensity of our connection.He continues to kiss me, a slow and tender fervor that ignites a fire deep within my soul.His hands move with a gentle passion, never ceasing their adoring strokes along my back and sides.I’m enveloped in the warmth of his arms as he pulls me closer, our bodies intertwining seamlessly, our breaths harmonizing in a sweet melody.
