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“Yes, we fit in many ways. I want to marry you, Jasmine.”
A sudden fear filled me. Sex was one thing. Marriage was quite another. I had certainly entertained the possibility, but I hadn’t expected it quite like this.
“I know that can be frightening,” he continued. “Trust me, I’m scared too. Yet, I know it’s right. I know we can be happy together. I want the opportunity to make you and Emily the happiest females on the planet.”
“I think I’m already one of those females. Can I take a day or two to consider this? Not because I don’t love you, Codrin. I do. I know I do. I need to process this a little.”
“Take as much time as you need because we will not marry until after the burial. I don’t want to distract you during that.”
“You’re already a huge, wonderful distraction. Yet, I agree, after Arlington Cemetery. We’ll marry then. I don’t need to think. We have a chance to find true joy. I’m not going to lose that.”
He squeezed my hand.
“I have to tell you that I’ve been seeing someone else.”
My heart jumped into my throat. I couldn’t think of anything more devastating. I fought the urge to cry.
“And,” he continued, “I’m not going to stop seeing her.”
I tried to jerk my hand free, but he held it tight.
“Her name is Emily.”
Relief surged through me.
“I thought—”
I punched him in the shoulder. “That’s not funny.”
“Of course it is.”
He was right. It was funny. I laughed and playfully punched him again. I could hardly hurt him.
He laughed with me. “I just needed to get that off my chest.”
“Paybacks are hell, Codrin. Remember that.”
“I’ll take it. If it means being with you, I’ll take it.”
We kissed one more passionate time before I left the car. I think it was appropriate to have that kiss on the front porch, where Marcie could see. Sooner or later, everyone at the office would know about us, but not right now. There was a time for revelations, and this wasn’t it.
Marcie was sipping wine and watching an old black-and-white movie. I knew she was going to sleep in the guest room, as I didn’t want her driving home with all the post-party drunks.
“This is a great movie,” Marcie said. “It’s really romantic. I can’t help but like these characters, even if they do screw up once in a while.”
“I’ll tell you what I think,” I said. “Romance isn’t dead. It’s just not on anyone’s agenda at the moment. If you look, if you try, you can find someone who will wow you. For a moment, maybe many moments, you won’t be you. The world will stop. You’ll be stunned. It will be almost dreamlike. Then, you’ll come back to yourself, and you’ll know a lot about that other person and yourself. You’ll know you’re capable of great joy.”
“Yeah, I think that’s right. Sometimes, I don’t think that sort of joy exists. I just have to have enough faith to chase it, I guess.”
“Good night, Marcie. Sweet dreams.”
I checked on Emily, who was sound asleep. The nightlight made her look ethereal. She was a beautiful child who had a lifetime ahead of her. I couldn’t help but think about her and Codrin and how they would bond. He would protect her. He would guide her. That special something would draw her to him as it drew me. I had no doubt that they would be good for each other, which would be good for me.
In bed, I wondered, for the first time, if Codrin wanted another child. I was not too old. Neither was he. That was a conversation we would need to have. If he didn’t, that was all right. If he did, so much the better. A sibling would be good for Emily. Learning to share was a life lesson. I reminded myself that the new year had begun, and it was going to be a good year, a very good year.
Codrin accompanied Emily and I to Arlington Cemetery. He was polite and subdued—if Codrin could ever be subdued. He stood behind me and allowed me to interact with the Colonel and all the other Marines involved. I received the folded flag, which started the tears. I had expected to cry. I simply hadn’t anticipated the flow. Now, it was really, finally over. I would never see Wayne again. I would never feel his touch. The finality wasn’t easy to accept. There was always a tiny gleam of something that believed in miracles. That gleam would last for a while. It might never be totally extinguished. Life would go on. It had to.
Codrin waited a month before he lowered himself to one knee and officially proposed. The diamond was more than large enough. His promise was more than elegant enough. Emily was in summer camp, something I had promised her. I was in Paris with Codrin. Night, under the Eifel Tower, he opened his heart and his soul. My answer was a foregone conclusion. I accepted because he was the man I wanted, the companion I wanted. My life was moving ahead, in lockstep with his.
